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'I know it's hard to believe. But biological speaking, they're our closest relatives.'
"Damn, looks like that snotty kid of Ben and Edna's is coming up the tunnel of light."
Tags:heaven, heaven’s gate, afterlife, afterlives, after-life, after-lives, gates of heaven, death, dead, dying, child, children, family, families, family conflict, family conflicts, black sheep, black sheep of the family, brat, brats, bratty children, relatives, relative, snotty kid, snotty kids, snotty children, snotty child, there goes the neighborhood, cloud city, tunnel of light, tunnel of lights, white light, disappointment, disappointing
"So much for nepotism."
Tags:religion, religious, bible, new testament, jesus, jesus christ, crucifixion, death of jesus, death of jesus christ, good friday, cross, crosses, crucifix, crucifixes, history, historical, biblical times, ancient, nepotism, favouritism, favoritism, bias, preferential treatment, preferred treatment, preference, preferences, family, families, relatives, children, politics, business, capital punishment
'Dad, have you ever thought about researching our family tree?'
"It belonged to my great great great. . . . creepy Uncle Edgar."
Tags:ancestor, ancestors, ancestry, headhunter, headhunters, head-hunter, head-hunters, headhunting, head-hunting, creep, creeps, hunting trophy, hunting trophies, heirloom, heirlooms, family heirloom, family heirlooms, inheritance, spear hunting, spear hunter, relative, relatives, great uncle, great uncles, family history
Miami: Home of the Miami Relatives
"My mom was a Holstein-Friesian, and my dad was the King of Diamonds."
Tags:animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, cow, cows, cattle, livestock, card, cards, playing card, playing cards, breeding, lineage, ancestor, ancestors, relative, relatives, holstein-friesian, king of diamonds, diamond, diamonds, king, parent, parents, parentage, dairy, farm, farms, farmer, farmers, family tree, family history
Why Uncle Abe Still Lives Alone"You call that clean?"
Tags:car, cars, vehicle, vehicles, automobile, automobiles, driving, driver, drivers, transportation, carwash, carwashes, car wash, car washes, filling station, filling station, fuelling station, fuelling station, garage, garages, service station, service station, servo, servos, attendant, attendants, complaint, complaints, complaining, chore, chores, never good enough, clean, cleaning, cleaner, cleaners, squeegee, squeegees, single, complainer, complainers, whiner, whiners, whining, nag, nags, nagging, bachelor, bachelors, picky, fussy, choosy, service, customer service, customer, customers, family, families, uncle, uncles, relative, relatives, living alone, relationship, relationships, relationship problems, relationship issues, grumpy, windshield, windshields, window, windows
"No, it's just that the royal inbreeding makes me look like a frog."
Tags:fairytale, fairytales, fairy tale, fairy tales, children's story, children's stories, story, stories, literature, children's literature character, characters, fictional character, fictional characters, the frog prince, brothers grimm, princess, princesses, prince, princes, royal, royals, royalty, animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, frog, frogs, amphibian, amphibians, inbreeding, breeding, lineage, parentage, relative, relatives, related, family, families, family tree, family issues, family problems, ancestor, ancestors, ancestry, science, biology, genetics, genes, history, historical, looks, appearance, personal appearance, facial features, family resemblance
The Arrival of Aunt Mathilda - Visit or Visitation?
Tags:ghost, ghosts, ghost hunt, ghost hunting, ghost hunts, mystery, mysteries, mystery show, mystery shows, documentary, documentaries, aunt, aunts, visitor, visitors, visiting, relative, relatives, in-law, in-laws, stay, stays, staying, extended stay, extended stays, scary story, scary stories, horror story, horror stories
When you said you were going to find your ancestors I thought you meant on the INTERNET!
"Another desert island cartoon clipping from my uncle."
Tags:desert island, desert islands, desert island cartoon, desert island cartoons, stranded, abandoned, abandon, marooned, maroon, irony, ironic, satire, satirical, hypocrite, hypocrisy, hypocritical, castaway, castaways, cast-away, cast-aways, island, islands, message in a bottle, messages in bottles, newspaper, newspapers, newspaper cartoon, newspaper cartoon, newspaper clipping, newspaper clippings, clipping, clippings, press, press clippings, press clipping, useless, repetition, repetitive, pointless, hopeless, monotony, monotonous, futile, unimaginative, derivative, derive, uncreative, uncles, uncle, nephew, nephews, family, families, relative, relatives
Tags:ancestor, ancestors, ancestry, family tree, family trees, relative, relatives, relation, relations, family, family life, family-life, extended family, extended families, uncle, cavemen, caveman, cavewomen, cavewoman, tribe, tribes, neanderthal, neanderthals, prehistory, family historian, family historians, family history
Contest of wills.
Rodneys family tree was a lot shorter than most.
'I just can't believe I'm related to them.'
"Stick around. There's a reception afterward."
'We're your family... please don't audit us.'
'This company is one big happy family.' - 'Yes, she's given all the best jobs to her relatives.'
When you said you were going to track down your ancestors I thought you meant on the INTERNET.
'Nuts, nuts, nothing but nuts!' When Squirrels Search Their Family Trees.
'Is it just my imagination, or do we have a lot more relatives now that we're throwing a tailgate party?'
"That's what I'd give my sister-in-law if she could take care of nice things."
Tags:sister in law, sisters in law, sister-in-law, sisters-in-law, in law, in laws, the in laws, in-law, in-laws, the in-laws, gift, gifts, present, presents, gift giving, gift giver, gift givers, buying gifts, buying presents, careless, carelessness, clumsy, clumsiness, useless, uselessness, immature, immaturity, childish, childishness, relative, relatives, insult, insults, insulting
'GPS (Grandparent Positioning System)'