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'See? The idiots put my danged knee replacement in backward!'
"Who do you want to replace when you grow up?"
"Aren't you the old guy in purchasing whose decades of slavish devotion inspired us to replace you with a small army of sycophants?"
Tags:office, offices, purchasing, purchase, purchases, purchase, purchasing department, department, departments, slavish, self-abasing, self-abase, dehumanizing, dehumanization, slave away, sycophant, sycophantic, sycophants, brown-nosing, brown nosing, suck-up, sucking-up, suck up, devotion, devoted, hard worker, hard working, loyal, hard workers, loyalty, old, old age, fired, replace, replaced, corporate culture, unappreciated, underappreciated
"Sure, the dish ran away with me, but then she left me for a melon baller."
Tags:nursery rhymes, nursery rhymes, dish and spoon, the dish and the spoon, the dish ran away with the spoon, cutlery, silverware, cheat, cheater, cheaters, affair, affairs, elope, elopement, eloping, two timer, two timers, two timing, adulterer, adulterers, breakup, breakups, break up, break ups, bad relationship, bad relationships, hey diddle diddle, melon ball, melon balls, melon baller, melon ballers, replaced, replacement
"We're considering outsourcing your job. Could you explain to this guy in Guatemala whatever it is you do around here?"
'You refuse to admit someone stole your horse, don't you?'
Tags:horse, horses, ride, rides, riding, rider, riders, replace, replaces, replacing, replaced, replacement, replacements, refuse, refuses, refused, refusal, refusals, denial, deny, denies, denied, embarrass, embarrassed, embarrassing, embarrassment, embarrassments, admit, admits, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'Mom, we've hired a few people to fill in for you while you relax on Mother's Day.'
'If they're energy saving lightbulbs, how come I have to use my energy to change one?'
Tags:lightbulb, lightbulbs, light bulb, light bulbs, energy saving, save energy, saves energy, green, environmentally friends, change, changes, changing, changer, changers, changed, lazy, laziness, bone idol, ironic, irony, replace, replaces, replacing, replaced, replacement, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
Dog steals the throne.
'...When you make stupid errors, you sit on the other bench.'
Tags:baseball, base ball, bench, benches, benched, sub, subs, substitute, substitutes, substituted, reserve, reserves, reserved, replace, replaces, replacing, replaced, mistake, mistakes, mistaken, error, errors, stupid, idiotic, silly, spike, spikes, spiky, sharp, painful, pin, pins, sit, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers
'Huggins, our goal is to go green, so we're replacing you with this plant.'
"For your vet bills alone we can hire two pups."
Tags:ageing, getting old, getting older, ageism, ageist, ageists, vet bill, vet bills, replaced, replacement, replacements, out of touch, out of date, behind the times, dog, dogs, puppy, puppies, pet dog, pet dogs, dog lover, dog lovers, pet, pets, dog owner, dog owners, mans best friend, man's best friend, laid off, laid-off, lay off, lay-off, lay offs, lay-offs, redundancy, made redundant, redundancies, downsizing, unemployed, unemployment
"In order to remain competitive in today's marketplace, Bentham, I'm afraid we're going to have to replace you with a sleazeball."
Tags:office, offices, business, businesses, businessman, businessmen, executive, executives, sleazeball, sleazeballs, fire, fired, firing, laid off, let go, boss, bosses, good guy, good guys finish last, bad news, outsourcing, replacement, replacements, replaced, replaceable, sales, salesmen, salesman, made redundant, redundancy, redundant, downsizing, ethics, scumbag, scumbags, management, manager, managers, competition, competitive
'I guess I don't need to ask how your new hip is working out.'
"We began with a hip replacement and just sort of riffed off that."
Tags:replacement, hip replacement, robot, robots, bits and bobs, trash, garage sale, yard sale, replaced, replace, upgrade, upgrades, prosthetic, prosthetics, amputees, prosthesis, surgery, surgeon, surgeons, get well, get well soon, hospital, hospitals, doctor, doctors, hip, hips, joint, joints, arthritis, growing old, older, age, aged, ageing
Librarian replaced by Google.
"We know technology would replace us someday."
Tags:modern tech, modern technology, modern technologies, replaced, replacements, pepper grinder, pepper grinders, wait staff, waiting staff, waiter, waiters, pepper shaker, pepper shakers, salt and pepper, restaurants, modern life, modern times, restaurant staff, end of the road, the end of the road, waitstaff, waitress, waitresses
"Hey, Fred, how's my old office?"
Tags:fire, fired, firing, redundant, redundancy, made redundant, sacked, sack, sacking, can, canned, canning, laid off, laid-off, laying off, offices, old office, old offices, replaced, replacement, replacements, unemployed, unemployment, office worker, office workers, executive, executives, manager, managers, business executive, business executives, business manager business managers, lay offs
'What's the use? Everyone has his own PC future-probability program these days.'
"Bad news, Roberts, we're being replaced by male models."
'The King replaced me with easy listening!'
Today's Mothers Day!
"We do all those old tricks electronically now."
Tags:you cant teach an old dog new tricks, you can't teach an old dog new tricks, offices, office job, office jobs, office work, office worker, office workers, replaced, replacement, replacements, out of touch, out of date, behind the times, desk job, desk jobs, laid off, laid-off, lay off, lay-off, lay offs, lay-offs, redundancy, made redundant, redundancies, forced retirement, dog, dogs, old dog, old dogs, expression, expressions
"Every day I live in fear that our jobs will be replaced by pillows."
Tags:animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, talking pet, talking pets, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, talking cat, talking cats, cat, feline, felines, cats, cat owner, cat owners, cat lady, cat ladies, pillow, pillows, throw pillow, throw pillows, cushion, cushions, interior design, interior designer, interior designers, interior decorating, interior decorator, interior decorators, home decor, decor, decoration, decorations, job, jobs, unemployment, replaced, work, couch, couches, sofa, sofas
'Not only could I replace you with a computer, I wouldn't even have to turn it on.'