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'Look, half the work is done! All you need to do is fill in the top part so we can legally say the bottom part.'
'In retrospect, maybe we should have spent a little more on R&D.'
"Research and development."
Tags:history, historical, pre-history, pre-historical, prehistory, prehistorical, stone age, bc, b.c., before christ, paleolithic, palaeolithic, cave-dweller, cave-dwellers, cavemen, caveman, neanderthal, neanderthals, early humans, research, development, r&d, researching, researcher, researchers, developing, science, scientist, scientists, innovation
"Daddy works in a magical, faraway land called Academia."
Tags:academia, education, research, academics, academic, educator, educators, teacher, teachers, professor, professors, tutor, tutors, doctor, doctors, doctorate, masters, bachelors, university, universities, college, colleges, uni, pretentious, snob, snobby, dad, dads, father, fathers, fatherhood, kid, kids, child, children, childhood, parent, parents, parenthood
"Genetic engineering got us into this mess, and genetic engineering will get us out of it."
Tags:genetic engineering, mess, mazes, scientists, mice, dna, dogs, bloodhounds, mouse, science, research, genetic engineer, genetic engineers, genetic engineering, gmo, gmos, quagmire, quagmires, consequence, consequences, genetic modification, genetically modified organism, genetically modified organisms, maze, labyrinth, labyrinths, unintended consequence, unintended consequences, unforeseen
Rats carrying lunchboxes enter a research lab as employees.
Tags:animal, animals, rat, rats, lab rat, lab rats, mice, mouse, medicine, medical testing, scientific research, medical research, science, testing, test, tests, experiment, experiments, research, researcher, researchers, scientist, scientists, lab, labs, laboratory, laboratories, animal testing, rat race, daily grind, nine-to-five, employee, employees, worker, workers, working, job, jobs, going to work
'Great! So I'll run these by the focus groups and see how they go over.'
'They've been like this ever since Mary presented her report. It's the worst case of paralysis by analysis I've ever seen!'
"We've done it! We've done it! We've discovered a detergent that takes the chore out of washing and makes all other detergents seem old-fashioned by comparison!"
Tags:scientific research, science, testing, test, tests, experiment, experiments, research, researcher, researchers, scientist, scientists, lab, labs, laboratory, laboratories, chemical, chemicals, chemistry, chemist, chemists, discovery, discoveries, celebrating, detergent, detergents, washing, cleaning, laundry, chore, chores, housework, invention, inventions, innovation, innovative, old-fashioned, dancing
"Would you mind if I ask SIRI for a 2nd opinion?"
"To be an expert, don't do the work. Talk about it!"
'Dad, have you ever thought about researching our family tree?'
Researchers at the National Nutrition Institute study whether or not food really does go directly to our thighs.
"Kind of makes your feel large and significant, doesn't it?"
Tags:philosophy, philosophical, medicine, medical testing, scientific research, medical research, science, research, researcher, researchers, scientist, scientists, lab, labs, laboratory, laboratories, microscopes, biology, microorganism, microorganisms, large, big, significant, important, cliche, cliches, wordplay, word play
ZZZ... 'Work, work, work, that's all I ever do!' ZZZ...
"You will note that their ability to comprehend, assess and process information increases dramatically when Professor Podhertz throws in the cat."
Tags:animal, animals, rat, rats, lab rat, lab rats, mice, mouse, scientific research, science, testing, test, tests, experiment, experiments, research, researcher, researchers, scientist, scientists, lab, labs, laboratory, laboratories, animal testing, cat, cats, feline, felines, stress, predator, predators, prey, escaping, survival, survival instinct, survival instincts, pressure, maze, mazes, labyrinth, labyrinths, survival skills, cognitive skills, thinking skills
"Don't mind me, folks. I'm just here to check the sprinkler system."
Tags:science, scientist, scientists, animal, animals, animal testing, genetics, genetic, research, researcher, researchers, lab, labs, laboratory, laboratories, scientific, scientific testing, animal rights, experiment, experiments, experimenting on animals, role reversal, plot twist, study, studies
'Right so we're agreed then, no one ever reads these reports so there's no point writing them anymore...and while we're at it we can stop filling out these forms, they're a waste of time.'
"My God! There are traces of tuna fish in this shipment of mercury."
Tags:medicine, medical testing, scientific research, medical research, science, testing, test, tests, experiment, experiments, research, researcher, researchers, scientist, scientists, lab, labs, laboratory, laboratories, shipment, shipments, material, materials, mercury, fish, tuna, mercury poisoning, environment, environmental issues, environmental problems, mercury content, nature, science
'No Jimmy! You can't cite Wikipedia as the main source for your assignment!'
"After you confess, can you fill out this survey to help us improve our interrogation methods?"
Tags:police, police officer, officer, officers, law enforcement, crimes, criminal, criminals, research, stereotypical, interrogate, interrogates, interrogation, interrogations, confess, confession, confessions, question, questions, questioning, subvert, subverted, subversion, survey, surveys, clash, whiplash, mood whiplash, mood swing, clashed, clashing, help, help us, help us improve, improved, improves, improvement, improvements, customer, customers, review, reviews, customer service, service, ironic, irony, ironically, modern life, modern world, criminal, criminals, crimes, consumer, consumerism
'Fred, rumor has it you're closing in on some profound, elemental truth about the universe, and I wanted to remind you that our research funding specifically prohibits that!'
Who's Who, Who's Not
Researchers on the storm in a tea cup project take a welcome coffee break,,,
'Let's agree to dispense with the rules of nomenclature and call it compound X.'