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"It pains me to tell you this, but it ain't broke."
Tags:broken, broke, fix, fixed, fixing, sales, salesman, salesperson, fix-it, repair, repairs, repaired, repairman, repairmen, customer, customers, customer service, appliances, truthful, honest, honesty, honestly, rip-off, ripped-off, returned, returns, return, shop, shops, store, stores, maintenance
Returning Christmas gifts.
Magic kit - make anything mysteriously disappear.
"So this is what you do when I pretend to leave, then come back unexpectedly in five minutes."
Tags:suspicion, suspicious, suspect, suspected, cheating, cheat, infidelity, marriage, married, catch, catching, caught, catches, morning, mornings, marriage, married, married life, breakfast, couple, couples, cliche, cliches, cliched, reference, references, gender, stereotype, stereotypes, unexpected, unexpected return, return, returned, trust, trusting, trustworthy, depend, dependable, reliable, reliability, rely, rely on, faith, faithful, trusts, literal, literally
Tags:parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, child, children, home, homes, boomerang, boomerangs, return, returns, returning, returned, returner, returners, baby, babies, son, sons, disappoint, disappoints, disappointed, disappointment, disappointments, shock, shocks, shocked, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'Yes... Now I see - no pocket. So perhaps the glove is defective.'
Tags:baseball, base ball, player, players, glove, gloves, sporting goods, sporting equipment, glove pocket, glove pockets, return, returns, returning, returned, defect, defects, defective, fault, faults, faulty, faulted, customer, customers, rubbish, useless, bring back, brings back, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers
"The gluten's back. And it's pissed."
Tags:gluten, gluten-free, fluten-intolerance, intolerance, intolerances, gluten allergy, gluten allergy, allergies, wheat, celiac, celiac disease, angry, pissed, unhappy, back, returned, return, chef, chefs, cook, cooks, food preparation, cooking, baking, baker, bakers, food, monster, monsters, creature, creatures, blob, blobs
"We've changed our investment strategy."
"No wonder they didn't like it. I forgot to sprinkle the antidepressant on it."
Tags:kitchen, kitchens, chef, chefs, cook, cooks, cooking, food preparation, preparing food, food safety, restaurant, restaurants, dining out, eating out, meal, meals, food, eating, dining, service, customer service, sent back, returned, sprinkle, sprinkles, antidepressant, antidepressants, drug, drugs, pharmaceuticals, pharmaceutical, medicine, medicines, meds, prescription, prescriptions, prescribed, medical, drug abuse, medicine abuse, prescription abuse, pharmaceutical abuse, addiction, addict, addicts, healthcare, health care, dark humor, dark humour, modern life
"Your husband went back to his first wife and is already on board."
Tags:religion, religious, bible, old testament, genesis, book of genesis, noah, noah's ark, ark, arks, boat, boats, ship, ships, big, animal, animals, gangplank, gangplanks, rabbit, rabbits, bunny, bunnies, relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, divorce, divorces, split, splits, separation, separations, breakup, breakups, break up, break ups, break-up, break-ups, ex, exes, first wife, first wives, returned, former, previous, left behind, dumped
Man invents the recall.
Calendar; 'Point of no return.'
'It's not that I don't like the product. I can't get it out of the package.'
"I was a dog in a previous life, but I came back as a god."
Tags:animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, talking pet, talking pets, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, talking cat, talking cats, cat, feline, felines, cats, cat owner, cat owners, dog, dogs, religion, religious, god, gods, reincarnation, death, previous life, previous lives, came back, returned, worship, bastet
"Now that I've swung back to depression, I'm truly sorry for what I did when I was manic."
Tags:court, courts, courtroom, courtrooms, trial, trials, legal system, justice system, law, judge, judges, lawyer, lawyers, counselor, counselors, counsellors, counsellors, attorney, attorneys, solicitor, solicitors, barrister, barristers, legal counsel, defence, defense, defendant, defendants, client, clients, apology, apologies, apologising, apologizing, sorry, saying sorry, remorse, remorseful, crime, health, mental health, depression, manic, manic depression, swing, swung, returned, insanity, temporary insanity
Book Redemption Center
Conan the Librarian.
Everyone stopped and stared at the familiar figure that had entered the Windows saloon. All of a sudden, the realisation hit them. The Start Menu had returned!"
'It's just my cough medicine. Stop with the 'You didn't get this from me' stuff!'
Tags:pharmacy, pharmacies, pharmacist, pharmacists, med, meds, medication, medications, medicine, medicines, pill, pills, syrup, syrups, drug, drugs, dealer, dealers, dealing, dealings, dealt, cough, coughs, coughing, coughed, return, returns, returning, returned, illegal, legal, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'Are you aware that you have three BlockBuster videos that need to be returned?'
Tags:angel, angels, saint peter, st peter, st, peter, heaven, entry, enter, entrance, blockbuster, video, videos, dvd, dvds, return, returned, returns, returning, rent, rented, rents, renting, renter, renters, hire, hired, hires, hiring, unfinished business, unfinished, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'I'm sorry, sir, but your insurance policy clearly states we don't cover acts of God.'
Tags:return, returns, returning, returned, insurance, insure, insures, insured, policy, policies, damage, damages, damaged, break, breaks, broke, broken, destroy, destroys, destroyed, cover, covers, covering, covered, act of god, acts of god, uninsured, uninsurable, guitar, guitars, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'Tomorrow we're returning this hi-def 3-D television.'
Tags:tv, tvs, television, televisions, return, returns, returning, returned, 3d, three dimensional, 3 dimensional, real, realist, realism, hi-def, hi-definition, scare, scares, scaring, scared, dragon, dragons, fright, frights, frighten, frightens, frightened, frightening, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'I wanna return these straight-leg jeans.'
Tags:return, returns, returned, returning, clothe, clothes, clothing, clothed, jeans, trousers, straight-leg, straight-legged, straight leg, straight legged, bow leg, bow legs, bow legged, cowboy, cowboys, cow boy, cow boys, shop, shops, shopping, shopper, shoppers, customer, customers, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'Nope. He's undersized. You gotta throw him back.'
Tags:fish, fishes, fishing, fisher, fishers, fished, fisherman, fishermen, role reversal, role reversals, catch, catches, catching, caught, catcher, catchers, return, returns, returning, returned, undersized, too small, measure, measures, measuring, measured, throw back, throws back, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers