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'Your Dad'll give your bike back when he realises he won't qualify for 2012.'
"I shaved my entire body and spent $2,600 on lighter bike components. Guess who's riding .04 miles per hour faster now?"
'Mountain goats are soft.'
'Relax, it's just like riding a rollercoaster.'
"That settles it, John! We're getting this bike a tune-up!"
'In his fantasy biking league, he's outpacing Bradley Wiggins...'
"First rule of bike club: no racing ahead."
"I just realized that unless I'm riding for some cause, I must look like an idiot."