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'Ok then, what's the second most important thing on campus.'
'No Jimmy! You can't cite Wikipedia as the main source for your assignment!'
Hoping to convince the university that he is worthy of a wrestling scholarship, Nick pins the director of admissions in 13 seconds.
'Congratulations. You're our 15th caller. The grant is yours!'
'Granted, it's not a traditional sport, but I was hoping a party school might offer athletic scholarships for beer pong.'
'I'm sorry but we don't have athletic scholarships for video games.'
'. . . It's not about whether you win or lose, it's about how big a college scholarship you get.'
Tags:college, university, soccer, football, sport, sports, children, youth, girl, father, parenting, parenthood, scholarships, funding, scholarship, game, ideals, wrong, right, reasons, reasoning, scholarship student, scholarship students, tuition fee, tuition fees, tuition, tuitions, uni, unis, college, colleges, fee, fees
'This next song is about a close call and a near success. It's called The Grant that Got Away.'
"Financially, you're in the top third but you're in the bottom third of that third. You are, however, in the top third of that bottom third?"
Tags:university, universities, college, colleges, university funds, university fund, college fund, college funds, money, financial stability, financial, stable, financially stable, finance, financial officer, finance officer, finance officers, finance, scholarship, scholarships, fund, funding, fundings, spending, spendings, save, savings, reject, rejected, rejects, rejections, accountant, accounting, accountants
After earning her PHD, Repunzel was right ar home in her academic ivory tower.
"Here's to the greatest goddam foundation in the history of foundations—the MacArthur Foundation, or whatever the hell it's called!"
"No time for cocoa, Mom. Getting my life plan started early by checking out colleges, courses offered and scholarships available."
Procrastinator Foumdation: 'We're putting off the decision to fund you for at least another month...'
"This won't be easy, given your grades. You'll need to find someone even dumber than you to co-sign."
Tags:student loans, student loan, loan applicant, loan applicants, loan officers, higher education, tuition fee, tuition fees, education, post secondary education, debt, co-sign, borrowing money, loans officer, banking, bank, university, college, higher education, intelligence, scholarship, begging, support, high cost of education
"Gabe's in the Guitar Hero program at Juilliard."
Tags:guitar, guitarist, guitarists, guitar hero, college, colleges, college kids, kid, kids, child, children, education, educate, educational, educated, educates, music, musical, musician, musicians, music theory, musical training, tech, geek, geeks, nerd, nerds, gamer, gamers, game, games, video game, video games, vidya, consoles, console, university, universities, scholarship, scholarships, school, schools, prestigious schools, music program, parent, parents, parenting
"It's confusing, son, but I'll try to explain: A nerd is a dork who's headed for college. A wonk is a nerd with one or more Ph.D.s. And then there' s the Uber-Wonk, like Daddy, who gets interviewed on TV all the time!"
Polly Foundation...Funds for bird research: 'He invesred his plunder well, and was devoted to his parrot.'
"How nice. The tooth fairy has donated $10 toward your college fund - for your tooth."
Tags:tooth fairy, tooth fairies, college tuition, rising college tuition, tuition, tuition fees, rising cost, rising costs, inflation, economic inflation, college debt, college debts, university debt, university debts, uni debt, uni debts, education cost, education costs, student debt, student debts, investment, education investment, college fund, college funds, university fund, university funds, funding, scholarship, scholarships
'It's a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't want to GIVE there.'
"I never dreamed it would be so difficult to give away money."
Tags:give away, gives away, giving away, charity, charities, charitable foundation, charitable foundations, tax, taxes, tax filing, tax filings, regulation, regulations, regulate, regulates, over-regulated, over-regulation, charitable giving, charitable givings, scholarship, scholarships, donation, donations, donate, donates, donating
"The typical immigrant story. A large family, we leave Vietnam, travel from place to place, finally open a small store. Scholarship to M.I.T. I'm a nuclear physicist."
Tags:immigrant, immigrants, immigration, vietnam, vietnamese, vietnamese immigrant, vietnamese immigrants, nuclear physicist, nuclear physicists, model minority, model minorities, migrant, migrants, scholarship, scholarships, advanced degree, advanced degrees, typical story, typical stories, immigrant story, immigrant stories
"We are prepared to offer a full scholarship to your son's phone."
Tags:son, sons, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, scholarship, scholarships, private school, private schools, high achiever, high achievers, gifted and talented, gifted child, gifted children, smart phone, smart phones, smart, clever, intelligent, phone, phones, school, schooling, pun, puns, play on words, wordplay
Teacher to students: 'A penny for your thoughts, but only if you're here on scholarship.'
'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'
Tags:american football, american, sporting career, career, careers, college, colleges, school, schools, scholarship, scholarships, expectations, expectation, expecting, failure, fail, fails, failed, senior year, senior, seniors, skip senior year, student, students, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers