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"I came by my wisdom the hard way. I wrote fortune cookie copy for thirty years."
A puzzle cube seeks enlightenment
"The meaning of life is cats."
"I've sensed a change in the universe. The Hokey Pokey is no longer what it's all about."
'You've come all this way seeking great wisdom, from someone who's stupid enough to sit half naked on top of a mountain?'
Two words, my friend...Yak dung.
"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"