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'I've already diagnosed myself on the web but I thought I'd come in for a second opinion.'
Health MOT's will attract 'worried well'
'If you trust your search engine more than you trust me, maybe you should switch doctors.'
"I looked up my symptoms on the internet and found out that I'm DEAD and it's YOUR FAULT!"
Health MOT's will attract 'worried well': I've looked up my symptoms on the internet and I think I've got ALL these life threatening illnesses.
"I'm very impressed with your web research,this self-diagnosis would be 100% accurate...if you were a Patagonian fruit bat!"
Doctor, I looked up my symptoms on the internet and I think I might be dead. Don't believe everything you read on the net.
"I'm glad you took the trouble to diagnose your own symptoms using the internet...and you'd be 100% accurate...IF you were a GOAT."
I've looked up my symptoms on the internet and I've either got swine fever,rift valley fever,bovine spongiform encelophalopathy,bluetongue or a stubbed toe!
"Your internet researched analysis of your condition and treatment is impressive,and it would be 100% on target...if you were a goat!"
"That's not what it says on the Web."
'Four out of five websites disagree with your diagnosis.'
"I don't care what they did on ER. You don't need an emergency triple bypass. You need an aspirin."
'I couldn't diagnose this ailment on the internet, so I was forced to come to you.'
"I'm not feeling too great. Maybe I'll ask WebMD what's wrong with me."
Tags:medical website, medical websites, website, websites, medical diagnosis, self-diagnosis, self-diagnosing, self diagnosis, self diagnosing, diagnoses, medical advice, symptom, symptoms, paranoia, hypochondria, hypochondriac, hypochondriacs, medical paranoia, medically paranoid, illness, illnesses, sick, sickness, sicknesses, medical malpractice, bedside manner
I feel absolutely fine doc, but a friend of my Mum's hairdresser said that might be a symptom."
"I don't care which doctor I see. 'm not going to listen to him anyway."
Tags:doctor, doctors, md, mds, gp, gps, general practitioner, general practitioners, clinic, clinics, doctors clinic, doctor's clinic, doctors clinics, second opinion, second opinions, advice, disrespectful, disrespect, listen, listening, conceit, conceited, waste of time, wasting time, time waster, time wasters, self diagnosis, self-diagnosis, misinform, misinformed, misinformation
"The internet says I have an eating disorder, I might be anorexic!"
"..Your analysis and medication would be perfect if you were a goat."
'My patients are picking up so much medical knowledge through the media that I feel more like their consultant than their doctor.'
"I saw on the internet that it was my genes that were making me fat and I thought you could get me a new pair!"
"I've been using the latest home tech and apps to monitor my health....And after feeding the results into some online medical sites I discovered I was dead!"
Tags:patient, patients, doctor, gp, gps, consultation, wearable tech, wearable technology, wearable technologies, second opinion, second opinions, referral, self-diagnosis, self-diagnoses, self-diagnosing, self diagnoses, self diagnosing, self diagnosis, healthcare, app, apps, gadget, gadgets, gadgetry
"Sometimes I wonder why I spent ten years at medical school and another 20 honing my skills..."
Tags:doctor, doctors, patient, patients, surgery, consultation, gp, gps, self-diagnosis, self diagnosis, self-diagnoses, self diagnoses, self diagnosing, self-diagnosing, healthcare, surgeon, surgeons, expertise, expert, experts, consultant, consultants, patient-care, patient care, medical training, medical school, medical schools
"I feel fine but according to my new watch I might be DEAD!"
"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"
Tags:doctor, doctors, doctors office, exam room, patient, patients, healthcare, physicians, examinations, symptoms, hypochondria, hypochondriacs, hypochondriac, medical paranoia, exam table, health, mental health, computers, internet, web, medical research, self diagnosis, self-diagnosis, self-diagnoses, self diagnoses