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"I know doesn't look like I'm doing anything, but I'm like a cat ready to pounce."
Tags:lazy, laziness, shirk, shirking, shirker, shirkers, slacking, slacker, slackers, prepared, preparedness, ready, wait, waiting, employee, employees, bad employee, bad employees, excuse, excuses, offices, office job, office jobs, making excuses, office worker, office workers, bad excuse, bad excuses
"Could you run those numbers by me again? I was thinking of an old love."
Tags:board meeting, board meetings, business meeting, business meetings, old love, old romance, old romances, romantic, romantics, distracted, distraction, distractions, lazy, laziness, unprofessional, professional, board member, board members, shirk, shirking, shirker, shirkers, account, accounts, paying attention, let down, let downs, let-down, let-downs
"Just do the work. No one cares if you get goose bumps."
"Didn't you ever have a book that you just couldn't put down?"
Tags:business man, business men, businessman, businessmen, businessperson, board meeting, board meetings, business meeting, business meetings, book, books, good book, good books, good read, good reads, addictive, professionalism, unprofessional, inconsiderate, board member, board members, lazy, laziness, shirking, shirk, shirker, shirkers, slacking, slacker, slackers
"I'll get those profit margin estimates to you as soon as I'm done with this paperwork."
Tags:unprofessional, lazy, laziness, shirking, shirker, shirkers, incompetent, incompetence, paper plane, paper planes, paper airplane, plane airplanes, paper aeroplane, aeroplanes, folding paper, paperwork, accountant, accountants, accountancy, accounting, procrastinating, procrastination, procrastinator, procrastinators
'I feel like I should be getting paid just as much as the rest of the people who do nothing around here!'
Desk trays - 'In' and 'It's not my job'.
Man with two in trays on his desk asks man with two out trays; 'Shouldn't one of those be mine?'
"Well, make yourself useful while you're steeping."
Tags:office worker, office workers, office work, office job, office jobs, kettle, kettles, teapot, teapots, steep, steeping, tea, bad manager, bad managers, order, orders, time wasting, time waster, time wasters, shirking, shirker, shirkers, hierarchy, hierarchies, office hierarchy, office hierarchies
'Now look what you've done!! You've aggravated my CARPAL TUNNEL SYNDROME!!'
Lazy people suffer less stress.
'I'm sure I've forgotten to do something today. Let's see now...I've taken four coffee breaks, I did the crossword puzzle...I took a long lunch...'
'Here comes the boss. Quick, look busy!'
'All of our operators are busy at the moment, please hold the line.'
Sign by water cooler - 'Do not linger: Hazardous to your job!'
"I've had my eye on you for some time, Parker....just what is it you're supposed to do around here?"
'The government have introduced a benefits cap.'
'I appreciate you doing the work of two men, Haskell, but Baker and Clayton never did anything either.'
'I pretend to work.They pretend to pay me!'
'Don't think of it as welfare -- think of it as 'shirker's compensation.''
Early irony. Man only began to progress after he started cutting corners.
Employee asleep with his head in the 'out' box.
'Jensen, how do you expect to get ahead in this organization if I have to keep firing you?'
He's on public assistance in 14 different states -- he's a migrant shirker.
'When the going gets tough, Pomeroy goes to lunch.'