Search by Search ID or Tag or use the Advanced Search
'Our defibrillator paddles are broken! Stick his hands in this toaster!'
'Your Financial Institution No Longer Exists.'
Tags:egg, eggs, boiled egg, boiled eggs, dippy egg, dippy eggs, chick, chicks, baby chicken, baby chicken, hatch, hatched, hatching, hatching egg, hatching eggs, breakfast, breakfasting, breakfast time, egg and spoon, baby chick, baby chicks, surprise, surprising, shock, shocked, nasty surprise, nasty surprises, dizzy, dizziness, hit on the head, fertilised egg, unexpected, soft boiled egg, soft boiled eggs, whack, breaking an egg, runny egg, runny eggs, breaking eggs
"Everything's more fun with Muppets!"
Tags:execution, executions, children's show, children's shows, childrens show, childrens shows, kid, kids, audience, audiences, child, children, inappropriate, cute, evil, fun, guillotine, capital punishment, death penalty, dark humor, dark humour, black humor, black humour, lighten up, lightening up, shock, offense, offence
"Je peux garder mes chaussettes?"
Tags:hell, welcome, welcoming, welcome to hell, gate, gates, entrance, entrances, opening, guard, guards, sock, socks, keep, keeps, keeping, allow, allowed, rule, rules, belonging, belongings, unexpected, surprise, surprising, surprises, happy, content, shock, shocks, shocking, afterlife, french cartoon, french cartoons, french
"We had originally planned to bring you along slowly, harper, but instead we're going to fire you."
Tags:fired, rookie, rookies, career ladder, career ladders, firing, getting fired, canned, can, canning, getting canned, getting the sack, sacking, newbie, newbies, incompetence, incompetent, sacked, laid off, laid-off, lay off, starting out, lay-off, lay offs, career ladder, the career ladder, shock, shocks, unfair, unfairness, lay-offs, redundancy, made redundant, redundancies, downsizing, unemployed, unemployment
"And what did my little darling do in school today?"
Tags:school, schools, preschool, pre-school, kindergarten, kindergartener, kid, kids, child, grade, grades, graded, good grades, home time, home, homes, parenting, parent, parents, parental, parenthood, mom, mum, moms, mums, teacher, teachers, get an a, getting an a, shocked, shock, surprise, surprised, long, day, hard day
Scaring the hunter.
Tags:hunt, hunts, hunting, hunter, hunters, hunted, scare, scares, scaring, scared, startle, startles, startled, startling, bird, bird, duck, ducks, balloon, balloons, pop, pops, popping, popped, pi, pins, bang, bangs, banging, banged, shock, shocks, shocking, shocked, surprise, surprises, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers
'We don't have to anesthetize patients anymore. I just walk in with this and they pass out in a second.'
Tags:athlete, athletes, athletics, pole vault, pole vaults, pole vaulting, pole vaulted, pole vaulter, pole vaulters, mattress, mattresses, fall, falls, falling, fell, hard landing, hard landings, health and safety, shock, shocks, shocking, shocked, jump, jumps, jumping, jumped, jumper, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers
Having never read the back of one of his products, Paul is horrified to discover how much he is giving away.
'It's a good thing that you've got rubber-soled shoes on. That could have gone all the way through you.'
To his dismay, Vern's entire surgical team passes out at the sight of blood,
Tags:hospital, hospitals, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, doctor, doctors, pass, passes, out, faint, faints, fainting, sight, sights, blood, bloods, bloody, surgical, operation, operations, team, teams, dismay, dismayed, shock, shocks, horror, horrors, incompetent, phobia, phobias, close to home
'Would everyone please join hands for a moment? I'd like to try jump-starting this meeting!'
"And that's how ya clean a deer!"
Tags:show, show and tell, deer, deer hunt, deer hunting, hunt, hunter, hunters, hunting, poach, poaching, poacher, poachers, poached, gun, guns, rifle, buck, big game, game, game hunting, school, schools, preschool, pre-school, kindergarten, kindergarteners, carcass, vegetarian, trauma, traumatise, traumatised, shock, shocked, shock value, surprise, lost innocence, toxic masculinity
"Don't worry Phil, we're just moving you down to four."
God being dismayed at the state of the world.
"We could argue forever about whether or not that was justified.
Tags:justifiable homicide, justifiable homicides, murder, murders, murdering, murderer, murderers, argue, argues, arguing, argument, arguments, shock, shocks, shocking, horrified, horrific, kill, kills, killing, underling, underlings, ceo, ceos, executive, executives, entitled, entitlement, shooting, shootings, shooter, shooters, debate, debates, debating, meeting, meetings, above the law
Thanks to the amazing new Zap-a-Slacker, parents are able to send a mild electrical current to their daydreamy Little Leaguers.
"Confound it, staff knows this door's to be kept locked!"
Tags:dark, dark humor, dark humour, black humor, black humour, hunting, hunter, hunters, high society, rich, the rich, rich people, rich man, big game hunting, big game, big game hunter, trophy, trophies, trophy hunting, human, human head, gory, fear, horror, classic horror, shock, shocking, strange, surreal, imagery, wall, walls, mansion, mansions, haunted, haunted house, halloween
Tags:manhole, man, men, gutter, gutters, drainage, drains, sewage, sewage system, traffic cone, traffic cones, cone, cones, startle, startled, startles, mole people, mole person, underground, scare, scared, shock, shocked, shocks, frightened, frighten, frightens, question, questions, questioned, query, queries, confused, confusion, confuse, confused
"A six-inch putt! How could I have missed it?"
Tags:sport, sports, golf, golfing, golfer, golfers, avid golfer, avid golfers, putt, putts, putting, putter, putters, golf ball, golf balls, golf course, golf courses, shower, showers, in the shower, disbelief, denial, incredulity, surprise, shock, depression, practice, practising, practicing, near miss, near-miss, near misses, near-misses, obsessed, obsession, obsessions, men, man, old man, old men, stereotype, stereotypes
Batman tissue dispenser.
Tags:bat, bats, superhero, superheroes, comic, comics, comic books, comic book, hero, heroes, tissue, tissues, dispenser, dispensers, tissue dispenser, tissue dispensers, shock, shocked, shocking, shocks, shell-shock, shell-shocked, surprised, surprises, surprise, fan, fans, admirer, admirers, admired, bathroom, bathrooms, sink, sinks, toilet, toilets
"Gee, I always figured him for No. 1!"