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"Do you think there's ANY possibility that the 76 pints of lager,13 bottles of wine and 12 kilos of chocolate you've had MAY have contributed to you feeling 'a bit under the weather'?"
"Well you can't possibly be expected to perform as lead dancer with the Bolshoi Ballet with a bad back...have a note for three months and see how you feel."
"Sick notes...anyone for anymore?"
"It's a 'well pissed off note'."
'I shan't be in today - I'm in bed with a nasty bug.'
GPs face monitoring over sick note levels.
"Please excuse Bobby for missing school yesterday. He had the plague."
'Please write that down in Latin so I can take a week off work.'
'Making staff get a sick note after one day is essential if we're to make the whole system work more efficiently!'
"I won't be in today. I've decided to live off the land."
'I need a sick note to cover me for the London Olympics.'
"Thanks for the 'Doctor's excuse' but I like to write my own material."
'In my capacity as your G.P, I've written you out a new style fit note.'
'Right... twenty squats and fifty press ups or no fit note.'
"I don't think your parent would sign this excuse, 'Timmy's Mom'."
'What am I supposed to do with a note from your parents? An absence can only be excused with a statement from your publicist.'
'You've only written a handful of sick notes since you started wearing that outfit, Doctor.'
'One more hangover like this and I'm going to have to claim for sickness during holiday absence.'
'You asked for a sick note from my doctor, here it is'
"I'm sick and can't come to school today. Do you need a loaner?"
'My doctor's fit note suggested a phased return to work. I'll see you for another smoking break tomorrow.'
'Not so fast Mr. Smith... you're forgetting the fit note I've filled out for your employer.'
"Now the geeks hold all the power. They're the ones who know how to forge a parent's e-signature."
Tags:geek, geeks, geeky, geekiness, nerd, nerds, nerdy, nerdiness, jock, jocks, computer geek, computer geeks, computer nerd, computer nerds, e-signature, e signature, forgery, forgeries, sick note, sick notes, medical note, medical notes, role reversal, school, schools, high school, high schools, pecking order, pecking orders, hierarchy, hierarchies
'Why's Burl hiding in the back seat, Joy?'
'And this is one of Jeff bribing the local doctor in to supplying a sickness note for his employer.'