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"I had a nice time, Steve. Would you like to come in, settle down, and raise a family?"
Single and Offended
Boyfriend Shirt, Boyfriend Jeans. . . Boyfriend.
'She got divorced again.'
Canine Speed Dating.
"Been lookin' for love in all the wrong carnivals."
Single malt whisky bottle reading lonely hearts column.
'I live with grand fantasies Harold.'
'My love life is the same, but my credit card life has never been so full.'
'Any hot prospects on the horizon, Cathy?. . . Anyone new within a three-foot radius who's vaguely tolerable?'
'Depressing, yet oddly reassuring to know I haven't lost my touch.'
'She's hearing someone new!!'
'She turned a corner and now she's backing out of a one-way street doing 90 miles an hour.'
The quest for spinsterhood.
"I noticed you looking at me."
"Carl! Carl! He's telling the truth! He's married. The single guy lives next door."
"It's not just me - according to this survey, being a scientist just doesn't ring any bells for single women."
"I'm still single. The stud finder I bought only locates nails."
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"No husband. No boyfriends. It's been so damn long, I'm reverting to virginity."
The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.
All my friends are getting married. I'm just getting drunk.
'I attract two types of guys: too forward or too backward.'
How to Meet People at a Bar