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'According to my wife, I snore, and one of these nights I may stop breathing.'
'Our interns work extremely long hours. The harness will help keep them awake during your operation.'
Knowing that his post-lunch fatigue was destined to strike, Larry wore his head-mounted airbag.
'Larry, this is me, talking to you. Stop trying to hit the snooze button.'
Though the R-331 was used exactly one time, it is still generally recognized as the worlds first alarm clock.
'Oh boy, I had the best nap today!'
'Did you ever notice that Grandpa grinds his teeth when he sleeps.'
Tags:grandpa, granddad, grandparent, grandparents, tooth, teeth, false teeth, dentures, grind, grinds, grinding, grinded, grinder, grinders, sleep, sleeps, sleeping, sleeper, sleepers, slept, asleep, notice, notices, noticed, noticing, grinding wheel, grinding wheels, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
Doug has another one of his flying dreams.
Dog steals the throne.
'Are you sure you set the alarm Bob? It looks as though we slept through spring.'
'Hello, Census Bureau? Another one of your census-takers fell asleep on our doorstep!'
'I just love your work. It makes me fall asleep immediately.'
'Sorry I'm late getting home from work. I overslept.'
I had this wonderful dream that I slept... but then I woke up.
'I dreamed about your case last night so I billed for it.'
'If only we could harness all that laziness.'
"You schlepped with her, didn't you?"
Tags:schlep, schleps, schelpping, schlepped, slept, soundalike, soundalikes, slang, slang term, slang terms, senior, seniors, senior citizen, senior citizens, elderly couple, elderly couples, accuse, accuses, accusing, accusation, accusations, infidelity, infidelities, housewife, housewives, suspicious, suspicion, suspicions
"I really would've just settled for some spare change."
Tags:home, homeless, homelessness, bed, one night stand, hookup, hooked up, sleep, sleeping, slept, beg, beggar, beggars, begging, begged, panhandler, panhandlers, shelter, homeless shelter, soup kitchen, food pantry, food pantries, no strings attached, single, desperate, poverty, donate, donates, donation, donations, one night stand, one night stands, pity, pities, pitying
'I'm having trouble sleeping, Rob. Do you think you could explain, one more thing how you picked our mutual funds?'
"Just like a man to tell me I'm not having a hot flash."
'I don't know what's worse...you, Jenkins, snoring through my presentation, or you, Fredericks, complaining that it was keeping you awake!'