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'It's only until the end of the season, Mom. I'll visit -- I promise!'
"What is it about an unfavorable soccer outcome that makes me want to wreak immediate havoc in the streets?"
'Billy, your mom's hassling the referee again!'
'Brian was dropped from the team after picking up a nasty leg injury.'
'Fantastic! Stupendous! Masterly! Mind blowing! Polished! Unbeatable! Amazing! Incredible! Out of this world!...a performance that's left me speechless.'
'Your team has been mathematically eliminated since June. Why are you still watching them?' 'I like the suspense.'
"The refereeing was only half bad... the winning team didn't complain."
'I still lose an occasional player to a hot-headed wolf. But for the most part, soccer diplomacy is working.'
'Nice Header, Lauren!'
'That's my mom. The restraining order won't let her get within shouting distance of the ref.'
"I've gone off Newcastle- can I have a Man Utd kit mum."
"Sounds like your father is rooting for lots of different countries."
'The team in white are bound to win - look at the size of the other team!'
'Bev has become the neighborhood soccer mom.'
'I don't care if there isn't a Premiership football club in Grimsby, that's where you've been transferred to!'
"Our new five million pound striker seems to have developed a phobia about dark tunnels boss."
Suicide swords for the England football team.
"I'm taking my ball home."