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"The secret to shorting is to be the shorter, not the shorted."
"How can a fund that's loosing us money call itself socially responsible?"
"Blindly following market trends generally works for me, but when it doesn't, I blame computer trading."
The Wall Street Tattler
"You see? God is punishing us because you bought futures in pork bellies."
"The market was down today on fears of fear itself."
"Are we responding to the Asian markets or are they responding to us?"
"Alright, I'll get you over the Alps, but I want stock options and cash bonus."
In case of falling stocks, break glass (bottle of gin).
'Is that new antacid stock going up Phil?'
FoodWaterOnline Stock Trading Tips.