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Student in the middle of an exam realises he has accidentally picked up dumb water.
'It's not that Ted was a bad guy, he was just all out of 5's.'
'The problem is I can't tell the difference between a deeply wise, intuitive nudge from the Universe and one of my own bone-headed ideas!'
Tags:wisdom, intuition, intuitive knowledge, knowledge, spirituality, decision, decision-making, money, intelligence, guidance, divine guidance, hunch, hunches, discernment, philosophy, spiritual growth, homelessness, homeless, beggars, begs, poverty, failure, skid row, bankruptcy, idea, ideas, dumb idea, dumb ideas, nudge, universe, wise, stupid, dumb, idiot
"It's easier to make 'em talk when you just cement the feet."
Tags:interrogate, interrogation, interrogates, interrogating, mob, mobs, mobster, mobsters, mob boss, mob bosses, mafia, mafia boss, mafioso, organised, organized, organised crime, organized crime, crime, criminal, criminals, question, questioning, torture, tortured, violence, violent, stupid, stupidity, stupidly, cement, cement shoe, cement shoes, wrong, bungle, bungled, incorrect, incorrectly, goof, goofed, spoof, parody, play on words, word-play, visual gag
Tags:april fools, april fools day, idiot, idiots, idiotic, moron, morons, stupid, stupid person, stupid people, bad idea, bad ideas, think through, thinks through, thinking through, foolish, foolish idea, foolish ideas, certain, certainty, certainties, think ahead, thinking ahead, thoughtless, careless, carefree, april
Bus of Fools
Tags:bus, buses, public transport, public, transport, bus stop, idiot, idiots, idiocy, modernmodern life, stupid, stupidity, absent minded, absent-minded, absent mindedness, absent-mindedness, forgetful, forget, forgetting, urban, urban life, urban living, commute, commuter, commuters, commuting, morning commute, driving, drive, drives, traffic, traffic jam, new york, new york city, nyc, n y c, regions, regional
"I got the tree down, dear."
Tags:christmas, christmas tree, christmas trees, christmas time, christmas decoration, christmas decorations, taking down the decorations, 12 days of christmas, incompetent, incompetence, chainsaw, chainsaws, hyper masculine, hyper masculinity, idiots, idiots, stupid, stupidity, lazy, laziness, literal interpretation, literal interpretations, following orders, following instructions
'And that's the boss. Nice enough guy, but wood from the neck up, if you know what I mean!'
"I used to be innocent. Then I was naive. Now I'm just dumb."
Tags:psychology, insecure, insecurity, insecurities, innocent, innocence, naive, gullible, dumb, stupid, intelligence, ego, self-esteem, self-confidence, self-worth, self-value, mental health, worry, worries, worrying, anxious, anxiety, anxieties, mental health, decline, declines, declining, deteriorate, deteriorates, deteriorating, deterioration, devolve, devolves, devolving, devolution, middle age, middle-aged, midlife crisis
Tags:slide, slides, sliding, slider, sliders, broke, broken, fool, fools, foolish, foolishness, stupid, stupidity, son, sons, mum, mums, mom, moms, mother, mothers, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, disbelief, disbelieves, dumb, silly, idiot, idiots, idiotic, unbelieveable, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
I'm with Stupid - I'm with Guilty
Tags:lawyer, lawyers, solicitor, solicitors, attorney, attorneys, guilt, guilty, plea, court, courthouse, courthouses, courtroom, courtrooms, defendant, defendants, verdict, verdicts, crime, crimes, criminal, criminals, matching shirt, matching shirts, i'm with stupid, dumb, stupid, idiot, idiots, tshirt, tshirts, tee shirt, tee shirts, t-shirt, t-shirts
The big questions in life.
"What a couple of clucks we are. Here's another mistake right up here."
Tags:jail, jails, prison, prisons, incarceration, behind bars, imprisoned, imprisonment, penitentiary, penitentiaries, correctional facility, correctional facilities, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, criminal, criminals, crime, punishment, punishments, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prison cells, cell, cells, cellmate, cellmates, celly, cellie, cellies, tally, tallies, tally mark, tally marks, counting, counting the days, mistake, mistakes, error, errors, dumb, stupid
"I told you they were magic beans and not to eat them."
Tags:jack and the beanstalk, magic beanstalk, beanstalk, beanstalks, magic beanstalks, fairy tale, fairy tales, fairy story, fairy stories, fairytale, fairytales, magic bean, magic beans, immature, immaturity, childish, childishness, stupid, stupidity, disobey, disobedient, disobedience, mistake, mistake, ignore, ignoring, ignored, life lesson, life lessons, regret, regretting, regretful, unsafe food
'You know, Mertins, when you take a vacation day, you can actually stay at home.'
Tags:vacation, vacations, holiday, holidays, office, offices, office worker, office workers, da off, days off, paddling pool, paddling pools, rest, rests, resting, rested, relax, relaxed, relaxing, relaxes, vacation day, vacation days, time off, fool, fools, foolish, stupid, stupidity, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
Despite its name, the Thesaurus was quite often at a loss for words.
Tags:dinosaur, dinosaurs, thesaurus, word, words, spell, spells, spelling, meteor, meteorite, intelligent, intelligence, fire, fires, rock, rocks, asteroid, asteroids, idiom, idioms, contradict, contradiction, contradictions, dumb, stupid, english language, language, languages, the argyle sweater, argyle sweater
"You bet I'd love a free trip to Cancún."
Tags:phone, phones, telephone, telephones, call, calls, calling, phone call, phone calls, telephone call, telephone calls, talking on the phone, talking on the telephone, phone conversation, phone conversations, telephone conversation, telephone conversations, telemarketing, telemarketer, telemarketers, tele-marketing, tele-marketer, tele-marketers, cold calling, cold calls, cold caller, cold callers, scam, scams, con, cons, fraud, trickery, free, free trip, free trips, cancun, mexico, won, winner, winners, vacation, vacations, holiday, holidays, travel, cruise, cruises, you've won, gullible, naive, stupid, dumb, incompetent, incompetents, incompetence, king, kings, sovereign, sovereigns, ruler, rulers, monarch, monarchs, monarchy, royal, royalty, guard, guards, knight, knights, modern life, too good to be true
Tags:insanity, temporary insanity, piano, grand piano, pianos, grand pianos, pianist, pianists, singer, singers, opera singer, opera singers, insane, upstage, upstaging, perform, performance, performers, starring daggers, angry, anger, angered, annoyed, annoyance, musician, musicians, overshadow, overshadowing, self centered, self centred, self-centred, self-centered, mistake, stupid, stupidity, stealing the thunder, accompanist, accompanists, knowing your place, know your place
"I can't eat these nutrition bars. They're for women."
Tags:fit, fitness, nutrition, nutrition bar, nutrition bars, health food, health foods, healthy food, for her, sexism, misogyny, misogynist, misogynists, for women, modern life, modern time, modern attitudes, gender issues, gender issue, gender inequality, brand, brands, branding, packaging, packages, package, illogical, stupid, stupidity, narrow minded, close minded, ignorant, ignorance, sales tactic, sales tactics, toxic masculinity
Wrap it in bubbles We don't have time for your stupid games, Fenwick We need to get this thing shipped to Philly,,, Now
Tags:liberty, liberties, bell, bells, ring, rings, ringing, ringer, ringers, philly, philadelphia, usa, america, american, la, package, packages, protect, protection, bubble, bubblewrap, wrap, hurry, hurried, rush, rushes, rushing, ship, ships, shipped, shipping, stupid, game, games, box, boxes, the argyle sweater, argyle sweater
"In a business setting with lots of underline nodding in agreement I'm very persuasive
Tags:executives, executive, business executives, business executive, business executives, manager, managers, boss, bosses, business manager, business managers, rich person, rich people, the one percent, the 1 percent, wealth divide, wealth gap, underling, underlings, impressive, unimpressive, flirt, flirting, persuasive, persuasiveness, stupid, stupidity
"You were a schlub in all of your previous lives, too."
Tags:fortune-telling, fortunetelling, fortune, fortunes, fortune-teller, fortune-tellers, fortuneteller, fortunetellers, fortune teller, fortune tellers, psychic, psychics, client, clients, customer, customers, modern life, crystal ball, crystal balls, crystallomancy, crystal-gazing, scrying, vision, visions, divination, seer, seers, occult, supernatural, previous life, previous lives, reincarnation, religion, religious, schlub, schlubs, talentless, unattractive, socially awkward, clumsy, stupid, dumb, loser, losers, bad news
"How's the burger?"
Tags:beach, beachfront, jetty, harbor, harbor side, harbour side, harbour, foodie, foodies, food stall, stall, stand, food stand, food hut, crab, crabs, crab meat, food lover, food lovers, burger, burgers, unrealistic, provide, providing, customer, customers, customer service, food industry, service industry, customer is always right, customer's always right, wrong, not for sale, misinterpret, misinterpreted, stupid, stupidity, snack, snacks
God laughs with you, not at you - unless you pray for something stupid.