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Happy Surrogate Thanksgiving
Tags:surrogate, surrogates, thanksgiving, thanksgiving dinner, thanksgiving dinners, turkey day, tofu, sub, substitute, substitutes, meat sub, meat substitute, meat substitutes, substitution, substitutions, eat healthy, eats healthy, eating healthy, healthy eater, healthy eaters, pointless, soy, soy protein, soy proteins
New From The People Who Brought You I-Can't-Believe-It's-Not-A-Petroleum-By-Product Sandwich Spread
"Dig in. It's a medallion-of-veal look-alike."
"In lieu of a monthly check I'll receive a crateful of seasonal fruit."
Tags:pension, pensions, pensioner, pensioners, pension payment, pension payments, fruit basket, fruit baskets, seasonal fruit, seasonal fruits, substitution, substitutions, substitute, substitutes, pension negotiation, pension negotiations, social inequitably, inequality, workplace pension, workplace pensions, pensions market, the pension market
"Instead of French fries may I have a hernia repair?"
Tags:menu, menus, hernia, hernias, hernia repair, hernia repairs, french fries, order, orders, food order, food orders, substitution, substitutions, doctor, doctors, gp, gps, physician, physicians, healthcare, health care, waiter, waiters, server, servers, eating out, medical plaza, medical plazas, hospital, hospitals, themed restaurant, themed restaurants, operation, operations, medical procedure, medical procedures
'It's a get well card from the substitute.'
Al Fripp: Filling in for the vacationing Herb Nelson
"Don't panic. It's only a prototype."
"Tonight, the part of the sea bass will be played by the chicken."
"Is that a choir robe?"
'Mom, I followed your time-honored legendary family recipe for Brussels Spout Bake with one exception - I substituted a pizza for the Brussels Sprouts.'
'Can I substitute saltwater taffy for a serving of seafood?'
"This dog has wheels!"
Tags:kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, father, fathers, fatherhood, dad, dads, family, families, animal, animals, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, dog, dogs, canine, canines, dog owner, dog owners, wheel, wheels, toy, toys, toy dog, toy dogs, fake, unrealistic, substitute, substitution, unacceptable, unwanted, upset, angry
"Coach is it time to send him in?"
"I'll be right back. If you need anything just yell."
"We're out of flu shots."
Tags:clinic, clinics, doctor, doctors, gp, gps, general practitioner, general practitioners, md, mds, doctors surgery, doctor's surgery, doctor's surgeries, doctors surgeries, flu shot, flu shots, flu-shot, flu-shots, flu jab, flu jabs, flu-jabs, flu-jab, tissue, tissue, box of tissues, replacement, replacements, substitute, substitution, substituting, substitutions, inadequate, inadequacy, unreliable, unreliability, health care, underfunded, cut backs, cut-backs, cut back, cut-backs, public spending, public spending cuts
Let's Get the Band Back Together
Tags:band, bands, instrument, instruments, junkyard band, junkyard bands, fiddle, fiddles, fiddling, fiddler, violin, violins, violinist, violinists, drum, drums, drummer, drummers, tuba, tubas, makeshift, replacement, replacements, substitute, substitutes, substitution, substitutions, reunite, reunites, reuniting, reunited
'Does this restaurant allow substitutions?'
"Good morning, children. My name is Miss Applegate. One false move and I'll kill you."
Tags:teacher, teachers, new teacher, new teachers, substitute, substitutes, substitution, substitutions, strict, strictness, class, classes, classroom, classrooms, class room, class rooms, ogre, ogres, hardass, hardasses, tough, tough lady, tough ladies, tough woman, tough women, false move, false moves
"We make substitutions within reason, Madame. We can give you courgettes instead of the aubergine, but we cannot provide Jean-Louis Trintignant in place of your husband."
Tags:restaurant, restaurants, dining out, eating out, meal, meals, food, eating, dining, waiter, waiters, server, servers, service, customer service, order, orders, ordering, menu, menus, substitution, substitutions, aubergine, courgette, reasonable, unreasonable, customer, customers, customer request, customer requests, actor, actors, french actor, french actors, famous actor, famous actors, celebrity, celebrities, relationship, relationships, love, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, relationship issues, relationship problems
Health food - salt substitute
Tags:health food, health foods, health food store, health food stores, health nut, health nuts, substitute, substitutes, substitution, substitutions, salt, salt the sidewalk, salts the sidewalks, salting the sidewalk, salt the road, salts the road, salting the road, snow, snowy weather, winter, winter weather, icy weather, icy road, icy roads, icy conditions
"When did she become 'kemosabe'?"
"Mr. Hazlett is in conference right now. Would you care to see his evil twin?"
Tags:evil twin, evil twins, conference, conference room, conference rooms, secretary, secretaries, take a message, takes a message, taking a message, receptionist, receptions, assistant, assistants, office assistant, office assistants, twin, twins, substitute, substitutes, substitution, substitutions, waiting room, waiting rooms
'I hate it when a substitute gets teachy.'
'Time out! ... Sorry, Bob. You just don't have your stuff today... I'm bringing in a reliever.'