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'Who vetted that leader?'
'Doug, Jeremy! Get back in here! The sales graph was upside-down!'
Orchestra Arranged As Normal Excluding Man At Back With Gun To His Head
Tags:classical, classical music, musician, musicians, musical, orchestra, orchestras, orchestral, wind, wind instrument, instrument, instruments, section, sections, violin, violins, violinist, percussion, percussive, exotic instrument, orchestra pit, pit, pits, gun, suicidal, tension, tense, mental health, mental health issues, dark humor, dark humour, black humor, black humour, tragic, tragedy
"As you know, Russian roulette is not a game to be taken lightly."
"Really, Mr. Schwatz, I haven't been that unsuccessful with the psychoanalysis."
"Wait a minute. We're lemurs! Lemurs!"
Tags:lemur, lemurs, primate, primates, primatologist, primatologists, primatology, lemming, lemmings, misunderstanding, misunderstandings, misunderstood, accident, accidents, suicidal, regret, regrets, regretting, warning, warnings, warn, warns, madagascar, soundalike, soundalikes, fatal mistake, fatal mistakes, mistake, mistakes, mistaken, identity crisis
"You have brought sunshine to my life and now I must say good-bye."
Tags:gun, guns, pistol, pistols, colt, colts, shoot, shot, shoots, shooting, toaster, toasters, toasted, appliance, appliances, kitchen, kitchens, kitchenette, suicidal, invert, inverted, subvert, subverted, dark, dark humor, black humor, black humour, dark humour, grim, grimdark, goodbye, goodbyes, death, dead, die, died, dying
'Great. Just what we need: another quality-improvement campaign!'
A man goes to see a guru who is contemplating suicide.
"Don't do it! Please Brian, I'm begging you. Don't do it!"
"Sometimes I live in the country. Sometimes I live in town. And sometimes I take a great notion to jump in the river and drown."
Tags:ventriloquist, ventriloquists, ventriloquism, dummy, dummies, dunk, dunks, dunking, bucket, buckets, drown, drowns, drowning, jump in the river, jumps in the river, jumping in the river, suicidal, suicidal thought, suicidal thoughts, mask, masks, masking, psychological problem, depressed, depression, clinical depression, cope, copes, coping, coping mechanism, coping mechanisms
"Oh my goodness – you should not be standing on a rolly chair."
Tags:suicidal, killing yourself, hang, hanging, hanging yourself, hanging himself, danger, dangers, health and safety, health and safety in the workplace, health and safety gone mad, missing the point, miss the point, noose, nooses, hate your job, hate my job, colleague, colleagues, annoying colleague, annoying colleagues
'Buy Grimbalto for depression. (side effects include headaches, paranoia, thoughts of suicide and depression.'
'Well, I have to start cleaning the next floor, Mr. Johnson, but good luck with all of your troubles!'
'You're out here because you're supposed to receive a performance review? I'm out here because I'm supposed to give one!'
A pigeon is about to jump off a roof.
"Now, that's the kind of innovative thinking I'd like to see around our shop."
Tags:stockbroker, stockbrokers, broker, brokers, suicidal, market crash, market crashes, crash, crashes, stock market, stock markets, investor, investors, innovate, innovates, innovating, innovator, innovators, innovation, innovations, office worker, office workers, bear market, bear markets, executive, executives, corporate hierarchy, corporate hierarchies, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, approval, boss, bosses, manager, managers, upper management
'A touch less rigour on the feedback next time, Stephen.'
"My broker jumped out a window, but that's small consolation."
Tags:portfolio, portfolios, financial, financials, financial portfolio, financial portfolios, economic downturn, economic downturns, suicidal, consolation, consolations, small consolation, little consolation, stockbroker, stockbrokers, broker, brokers, stock, investor, investors, investment, investments, money problem, money problems, financial adviser, financial advisers, financial advisor, financial advisors
A man hangs himself in the voting booth.
Tags:vote, votes, voting day, voting days, voting booth, voting booths, choice, choices, psychology, psychologist, psychologists, hang, hangs, hanging, suicidal, difficult choice, difficult choice, option, options, bad option, bad options, candidate, candidates, politician, politicians, democracy, democracies, democratic system, democratic traditions, least worst option, least worst options, lesser of two evils, two evils, compromise, compromises, compromising, compromise candidate, compromise candidates
"I thought he seemed depressed!"
Tags:depression, depressed, depressing, climber, climbers, climbing, rock climber, rock climbers, rock climbing, scale, scales, scaling, wall, walls, suicidal, tandem, athlete, athletes, athletics, mental health, mental health problem, mental health problems, mental health issue, mental health issues
"I'm sorry. Mr. Broadbank seems to have stepped away from his desk."
Tags:financial crisis, market crash, market crashes, crash, crashes, great recession, recession, recessions, secretary, secretaries, unflappable, placid, calm, demeanor, demeanors, demeanour, suicidal, executive, executives, business executive, banker, bankers, banking, housing crash, housing crashes, market correction, market corrections, finances, financial advisor, financial advisors, financial adviser, financial advisers
Headlong slide into oblivion.
"I'm sorry, Mr Trump, but our time is up."
Tags:gop, republican, republicans, republican party, republican parties, time is up, therapy, therapist, therapists, counselling, counsellor, counsellors, counseling, counselor, counselors, shrink, shrinks, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, psychiatry, mental health, trump, donald trump, president donald trump, president trump, trump administration, trump scandal, trump scandals, trump controversy, trump controversies, suicidal, self destruction, self destructive