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"Well, I thought installing a kitchen faucet without having to call the plumber was a pretty good 'praise'."
Sign with directions for "Lost" and "Found"
Blessed are the brief.
". . . plus % entertainment tax."
"No matter how badly you have sinned, you don't have to worry about losing your coverage!"
"The minister is known to do a mic drop after a particularly good sermon."
Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'
Sermon: '...and on the eighth day he created creationists.'
Tags:church, churches, sermon, sermons, sunday worship, sunday worships, sermon title, sermon titles, creation story, creation stories, creationist, creationists, genesis, bible story, bible stories, preacher, preachers, priest, priests, vicar, vicars, parishioner, parishioners, congregation, congregations, religion versus science, religion vs science
"What d'you say we try sneaking out before the last one?"
"Sir, booing the Pastor is not allowed."
"You take an offering "EVERY" week?"
The offering increased substantially after being live streamed on the jumbotron.
"Son of God or not, no one comes to church dressed like that."
"I hope Jesus returns as a football player, so you will spend time with Him on Sundays!"
Tags:jesus, sunday worship, sunday worships, church service, church services, church, churches, sunday football, sermon, sermons, worship, sermon, sermons, christianity, christian, christians, religion, football, tv sports, addicted to tv sports, wife vs husband, jesus returns, football vs church, sundays
"Today's message really convicted me Preacher. Good thing church is only once a week."
"Your sermon started out strong, then it got a little slow and I nodded off."
Tags:preacher, preachers, vicar, vicars, minister, ministers, priest, priests, sermon, sermons, sunday sermon, sunday sermons, sunday worship, sunday worships, parishioner, parishioners, congregation, congregations, nap, naps, napping, sleepy, sleepiness, bible reading, bible readings, constructive criticism, feedback, feedbacks
"If God wanted me to go to church he wouldn't have put football on Sundays."
Two doors at the church, one labelled cry room the other snore room.
A blank church notice board with church in background
"And you thought you were having a bad hair day."
"The good book says to tweet others as you would want to be tweeted."
"I really envy my left foot...it slept through his entire sermon!"
"Wow. Scary sermon today."
Tags:church, chapel, chapels, churches, congregation, congregations, parishioner, parishioners, sermon, sermons, fire and brimstone, worship, sunday worship, sunday service, sunday services, sunday worships, scary, scariness, sin, sins, sinner, sinners, sinning, vicar, vicars, preacher, preachers, minister, ministers
"I didn't say, 'Simon says'..."
Tags:priest, faith, children's games, catholic, faith, god, mass, simon says, congregation, congregations, faiths, prayer, prayers, praying, priests, sunday worship, sunday worships, parishioner, parishioners, children's game, misunderstanding, misunderstandings, latin, roman catholic, roman catholics, roman catholic church, church, churches
"Today's message will be non-controversial, seeker friendly, and unchallenging in any way."
Tags:religious message, religious messages, church, churches, sermon, sermons, sunday worship, sunday worships, church service, service, services, message, messages, preacher, preachers, minister, ministers, ministry, ministries, controversy, controversies, controversial, unchallenging, challenge, challenges, theology, theologian, theologians