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'It's a bird, it's a plane...it's superman! Oh brother, a bird and a plane aren't even close to the same size...I really need some new glasses.'
'And what misguided soul gave you the idea that a lot of crime was occurring underwater in the first place?'
"Besides caring too much? I'd probably have to go with Kryptonite."
Tags:superhero, superheroes, hero, heros, job interview, recruit, new recruit, recruiter, recruiting, potential employee, new employee, hire, hiring, human resources, hr, career, careers, job, jobs, work, employment, employer, weakness, what is your weakness, kryptonite, job search, job hunting, weaknesses
"I yelled 'shazam' and there was lightning and a big explosion. They say I was unconcious for two hours."
Tags:hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, doctor's office, doctor's offices, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, superhero, superheros, hero, heros, superpower, superpowers, incompetent, incompetents, incompetence, shazam, lightning, unconscious, knocked out, explosion, explosions
Rejected Spider-man lunchbox ideas
"Hang on, there's a new definition of evil."
Tags:definition, definitions, new definition, new definitions, evil, legal definition, legal definitions, new law, new laws, new legislation, legislator, legislators, super hero, super heroes, superhero, superheroes, super, supers, hero, heroes, super power, super powers, annoy, annoying, nuisance, nuisances, white collar crime, white collar crimes, white collar criminal, white collar criminals
"When those damn graphic novels started coming out—that's when it all went down the toilet."
Batman at the Maternity Ward
Tags:maternity ward, maternity wards, maternity unit, maternity units, maternity clinic, maternity clinics, nurse, newborn, newborns, nursery, nurseries, baby, babies, infant, infants, father, fathers, fatherhood, taking after your dad, taking after your dads, superhero, superheroes, super hero, super heroes, comic book, comic books, comic book character, comic book characters, superhero movie, superhero movies, crime fighter, crime fighters, superhero life, life of a superhero, new dad, new dads, new father, new fathers, father's pride, dad's pride, pride
"Your sister got another promotion."
Tags:superhero, superheroes, hero, heroes, cape, capes, crime fighting, crime fighter, crime fighters, signal, signals, message, messages, kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, family, families, son, sons, sibling, siblings, sibling rivalry, adult child, promotion, promotions, promoted, brag, bragging, boast, boasting, competition, competitive, technology, modern life
Superman Heads Back To The Fridge
Tags:bachelor, bachelors, life, everyday, every day, ordinary, ordinary life, normal, normal life, bachelor pad, bachelor life, hero, heroes, heroic, superhero, superheroes, living alone, lonely, alone, loneliness, single, single life, living alone, independence, independent, independently, hungry, hunger, bored, boring, boring life, bored life, modern, modern world, modern life, modern living, home alone, alone at home
"Supermom isn't home right now - she's out fighting for truth, justice and a buck."
'...But first, this a job for litigator-man, who needs you to sign some release forms.'
"No pup of mine is going to fly around making an ass of himself."
Tags:parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, mom, mum, mums, moms, mother, mothers, dad, dads, father, fathers, pet, pets, dog, dogs, pup, pups, puppies, puppy, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, dog owner, dog owners, animal, animals, talking dog, talking dogs, talking animal, talking animals, superhero, superheros, disapproving, disapprove
"That's great, but you still have to walk more."
Tags:superhero, superheroes, superpower, superpowers, super power, super powers, hero, heroes, doctor, doctors, hospital, hospitals, md, mds, gp, gps, general practitioner, general practitioner, clinic, clinics, check up, medical check up, check ups, medical check ups, advice, health advice, exercise, exercising, unfit, unfitness, overweight, obesity, obese, unhealthy, unhealthiness
"Will I be penalized for not having health insurance if I'm young and I'm actually invincible?"
Tags:health insurance, mandate, mandates, healthcare mandate, healthcare, obamacare, repeal, repeals, repealing, tax, taxes, taxing, penalty, penalties, superhero, superheroes, liability, liabilities, insurance company, insurance companies, tax day, tax days, tax season, paying taxes, american healthcare
"Still not batman."
A superhero dog asks to be walked.
Tags:superhero, superheroes, walk, walks, walkies, walking, walk the dog, walks the dog, walking the dog, fly, flies, flying, human flight, go out, goes out, dog owner, dog owners, dog lover, dog lovers, dog person, dog people, comic, comics, comic book, comic books, beg, begs, begging, animal trainer, animal trainers, dog walker, dog walkers, dog trainer, dog trainers
An ellipsis in the sky
Batman getting the subway
"Oh, for pity's sake, wouldn't he be better off learning to walk first?"
Tags:learn to crawl, learns to crawl, learning to crawl, crawl before you can walk, cliche, cliches, parent, parents, parenting, walk, walks, walking, toddler, toddlers, superpower, superpowers, superhero, superheroes, supeheroic, fly, flies, flying, flight, human flight, teach, teaches, teaching, skip ahead, skips ahead, skipping ahead, ambitious, ambitiousness, ambition, ambitions, dad, dads, father, fathers, infant, infants, baby, babies
Tags:trump, donald trump, president donald trump, president trump, trump administration, trump scandal, trump scandals, trump controversy, trump controversies, twitter storm, tweet, tweets, trump tweet, trump tweets, blunder, blunders, blundering, superhero, superheroes, hero, heroes, film, films, incompetent trump, incompetent, incompetence
"Hold my hand and we can use the carpool lane."
Tags:carpool lane, carpool lanes, car-pool lane, car-pool lanes, carshare, carshares, car share, car shares, car-share, car-shares, traffic lane, superpower, superpowers, super power, super powers, superhero, superheroes, commute, commutes, commuting, commuter, commuters, public transport, public transports
"Lives in the basement and has yet to bring home a dime."
Tags:basement, basement dweller, basement dweller, live at home, living at home, lives at home, superhero, superheroes, parent, parents, parents' house, parents house, useless, worthless, non-contributor, non-contributors, non-contributing, loser, losers, millennial, millennials, generation, generations, generation gap, generation gaps, appearance, appearances, facade, facades, faker, fakers, faking, impressive, all show, comic, comics, comic book, comic books
'When we talked about changing the firms image I was thinking more about a new letterhead.'
"I'm not sure we still carry the Wonderbra."
Tags:superhero, superheroes, hero, heroes, comic, comics, fictional character, fictional characters, character, characters, film, films, movie, movies, lingerie, lingerie store, lingerie stores, lingerie shop, lingerie shops, bra store, bra store, bra shop, bra shops, corset, corsets, shopping for bras, shopping for underwear, shopping for lingerie, lingerie counter, lingerie counters, clerk, clerks, staff, customer service, service, question, questions, request, requests, customer, customers, patron, patrons, out of stock, out-of-stock, fashion, women's wear, clothing, clothes, women's clothing, women's clothes, shopping, shopper, shoppers, not longer, carry, product, products, woman, women