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"Of course I'm listening to your expression of spiritual suffering. Don't you see me making eye contact, striking an open posture, leaning towards you and nodding emphatically."
Tags:bedside manner, bed side manner, surgeon, surgeons, consultant, consultants, medical, hospital, hospitals, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, patient, patients, suffer, suffering, spiritual, listen, listens, sympathy, empathy, negligent, negligence, procedure, medical student, medical students, med student, med students, training, robotic, robotics, demeanor, demeanour, eye contact
'I realize it's a bit strange, sir, but due to the new health information privacy laws, none of us is allowed to know your identity.'
'That's how much time your HMO allots for bypass surgery.'
'See? The idiots put my danged knee replacement in backward!'
'He never starts surgery until he can play the game three times in a row without messing up.'
'Your HMO isn't convinced that you need surgery. When I say 'action!' start writhing and moaning wildly.'
'OK, Mr. Nurtz. Time to get you prepped for surgery.'
'What am I blind, Bob?'
'It's an organ rejection form letter!'
'Great news! We found a donor body!'
"First, we numb you by showing you today's headlines."
Tags:doctor, doctors, hospital, hospitals, surgeon, surgeons, surgery, surgeries, operation, operations, operating theatre, operating theatres, operating room, operating rooms, media, news, newspaper, newspapers, magazine, magazines, technology, online, fake news, laptop, laptops, tablet, tablets, smartphone, smartphones, headline, headlines, anaesthetized, anaesthetize, anesthetized, anesthetize, anaesthetised, anaesthetise, anaesthetist, anaesthetists, anesthetist, anesthetists, painkiller, painkillers, numbing, numb, numbed
"He's going to be fine. We're just putting his giblets back."
'Surgery went well, Mr. Moore. I had a lot of fun rebuilding your knee joint.'
Tags:doctor, doctors, surgeon, surgeons, surgery, surgeries, operation, operations, knee joint, knee joints, knee, knees, joint, joints, lego, rebuild, rebuilds, rebuilding, rebuilt, operating theater, operating theatre, hospital, hospitals, injure, injures, injury, injuries, injured, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers
'Nurse, has the staff been eating in pre-op again? There's mayonnaise on the scalpel.'
'For cryin' out loud! Just for once can't we go on vacation without you bringing some work along!?'
Surgical Ward- Please Replace Divots
Tags:surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, operation, operations, operating room, operating rooms, surgical ward, surgical wards, operating theatre, operating theatre, operating theater, operating theaters, golf, golfer, golfers, golfing, divot, divots, golf divot, golf divots, hospital, hospitals, hippocratic oath, malpractice, medical malpractice
"I want to have that operation I heard about on All Things Considered."
Tags:hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, doctor's office, doctor's office, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, operation, operations, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, plastic surgery, cosmetic surgery, radio, radio show, radio shows, influenced, influencer, influencers, trend, trends, trendy
"Your kidney is in a holding pattern over new jersey and should be here in two hours."
Tags:surgeon, surgeons, surgery, operation, operations, doctor, doctors, md, mds, m.d.s, m.d., gp, gps, g.p.s, g.p., general practitioner, general practitioners, hospital, hospitals, doctors appointment, doctors appointments, doctor's appointment, doctor's appointments, physician, physicians, kidney, kidneys, transplant, transplants, donor, donors, organ donor, organ donors
'I hate it when we operate on malpractice lawyers.'
"I take it, General Sedgewick, you're about to propose a surgical strike."
Tags:doctor, doctors, medical, medicine, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, operation, operations, operating, surgical, strike, strikes, military, strategy, strategies, military strategy, military strategies, general, generals, officer, officers, meeting, meetings, business, propose, proposal, proposals, surgical strike, surgical strikes, military operation, military operations, wordplay, word play, attack, plan, plans, planning
"Last week on 'Top Surgeon' Erica won immunity, while Carl was sent home for killing his patient during routine gallbladder surgery."
Tags:hospital, hospitals, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, surgery, surgeries, operation, operations, surgeon, surgeons, gallbladder, gallbladder surgery, routine surgery, routine, surgeries, malpractice, medical malpractice, killing, television, televisions, television show, television shows, television program, television programs, television programmes, television programmes, tv, tvs, tv show, tv shows, tv program, tv programs, tv programmes, tv programmes, t.v., t.v.s, t.v. show, t.v. shows, t.v. program, t.v. programs, t.v. programme, t.v. programmes, watching t.v., watching tv, watching television, reality, reality tv, reality television, reality show, reality shows, immunity, send home, last week, bad idea, bad ideas, dangerous, irresponsible
Tags:operation, operations, operating, o.r., o.r.s, or, ors, operating room, operating rooms, operation room, operation rooms, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, hospital, hospitals, medicine, medical, healthcare, health care, magic, magic trick, magic tricks, magician, magicians, magic act, magic acts, illusionist, illusionists
"I'm thinking of getting out of medicine completely… or volunteering in a third world country to do my liposuction."
'I'm past the liver, and there's the inflamed gallbladder. ... OK, switch us back to the game...'
Tags:surgeon, surgery, surgeons, nurse, game, games, gaming, match, matches, matching, score, see the score, scores, scored, scoring, inflamed gallbladder, gallbladder, gallbladders, watching the game, the game, watch, watching, watches, put the game on, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers
'What the... there's the gold earring I lost when we did his triple bypass four years ago.'