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'Four million, eight hundred seventeen thousand sixty three... two? Wait... four... wait, oh boy, I probably should have been writing this down.'
"Tonight there is no news and recent surveys indicate that that my be good news."
Tags:television, televisions, watching television, tv, tvs, watching tv, t.v., t.v.s, watching t.v., news, newscaster, newscasters, reporter, reporters, announcer, announcers, broadcaster, broadcasters, newsman, newsmen, news anchor, news anchors, anchormen, anchorman, presenter, presenters, media, broadcasting, reporting, good news, no news, survey, surveys
'My mother's resolution is to eat more vegetables, and my resolution is to help her by giving her mine.'
'Before you're released, would you mind taking our exit survey?'
"O.K. That covers the last meal. Now, which would you prefer, hanging, electrocution, or lethal injection?"
Tags:prison, prisons, jail, jails, incarceration, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, prisoner, prisoners, criminal, criminal, punishments, capital punishment, death penalty, officer, officers, guard, guards, jailer, jailers, prison guard, prison guards, note, notes, questionnaire, questionnaires, survey, surveys, data collection, last meal, last meals, meal, meals, food, hanging, electrocution, lethal injection, execution, executions, methods of execution, condemned, black humor, black humour, dark humor, dark humour
"One final question: Do you own or have you ever owned a fur coat?"
Tags:leopard, leopards, fur coat, fur coats, survey, surveys, regret, regrets, business man, business men, businessman, business men, business person, business people, businessperson, big cat, big cats, animal rights, animal product, animal products, endangered animal, endangered animals, karma, revenge
Regulators Claim Practices Are Overloaded With Patient Surveys.
How was your confusion experience?
'We'll be putting you in the 'crabby neighbor', demographic.'
"After you confess, can you fill out this survey to help us improve our interrogation methods?"
Tags:police, police officer, officer, officers, law enforcement, crimes, criminal, criminals, research, stereotypical, interrogate, interrogates, interrogation, interrogations, confess, confession, confessions, question, questions, questioning, subvert, subverted, subversion, survey, surveys, clash, whiplash, mood whiplash, mood swing, clashed, clashing, help, help us, help us improve, improved, improves, improvement, improvements, customer, customers, review, reviews, customer service, service, ironic, irony, ironically, modern life, modern world, criminal, criminals, crimes, consumer, consumerism
Pop-up ad in front of a cartoon.
Tags:cartoons, comic, comics, customer, customers, customer service, service, customer feedback, feedback, survey, surveys, questionnaire, questionnaires, opinion, opinions, reader satisfaction, improving, improvements, suggestion, suggestions, suggesting, annoying, annoyance, annoyances, inconvenient, pop-up, pop-ups, pop-up ad, pop-up dads, ad, ads, advertising, online, internet, computer, computers, technology, modern life
"Excuse me, sir—care to take a moment to check out my new clipboard? Ma'am? I just got a new clipboard. New clipboard, anyone? Anyone?"
Tags:clipboard, clipboards, poll, polls, polling, pollster, pollsters, street scene, street scenes, solicit, solicits, soliciting, solicitor, solicitors, solicitation, sell, sells, selling, seller, sellers, survey, surveys, surveying, annoy, annoys, annoying, annoyance, irritating, irritate, irritates, stop people, stops people, stopping people, pedestrian, pedestrians
'If the election were to be held today, what would be your excuse for not voting?'
'This is the questionnaire we need everyone to fill out about their views on excessive bureaucracy.'
"How would you like me to answer that question? As a member of my ethnic group, educational class, income group, or religious category?"
Tags:politically correct, political correctness, ethnic group, social group, income group, educational group, religious group, opinion, opinions, politics, political, think before you speak, poll taker, polls, survey, surveys, class system, classes, society, modern life, pc, avoiding offense, avoiding offence, no offense, no offence, anti-discrimination, language, choice of words, word choice, polite, politeness, manners
"You call yourselves a demographic?"
Tags:demographic, survey, surveys, surveying, questionnaire, questionnaires, represent, representative, unrepresentative, un-representative, inaccurate, anomalous, anomalies, group study, group studies, social study, social studies, stats, statistics, statistical, statistical characteristics, human population
'We've got the statistical analysis back...93% of the people who returned the survey thought it was 100% waste of time.'
Cross-stitched land survey.
Tags:art, home decor, decor, decoration, decorations, handicrafts, handmade, cross-stitch, cross-stitches, sewing, embroidery, wall hanging, wall hangings, art, god bless this home, property, properties, real estate, house, houses, home, homes, land, survey, surveys, land survey, land surveys, surveyor, surveyors, land surveyor, land surveyors, assessor, assessors
"87% of the 56% who completed more than 23% of the survey thought it was a complete waste of time."
Regulators claim practices are overloaded with patient surveys.
"I'm not trying to sell you anything, sir. I'm doing market research, and all I ask is two or three hours of your time to answer a few thousand questions."
Tags:marketing call, marketing calls, telemarketing, telemarketer, telemarketers, market research, marketing research, nuisance, nuisances, cold call, cold calls, cold calling, annoyance, annoyances, irritate, irritates, irritating, frustrate, frustrates, frustrating, frustration, frustrations, question, questions, questioning, survey, surveys, surveying, poll, polls, polling, pollster, pollsters
'This is interesting, 70% of respondents to our survey said they don't respond to surveys.'
Results of the Tropical Fish Sex Survey
"Oh my, everybody you mentioned would make a great President."
Tags:animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, talking pet, talking pets, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, talking dog, talking dogs, dog, dogs, canine, canines, dog owner, dog owners, politics, government, government, political, president, presidents, politician, politicians, poll, polls, polling, pollster, pollsters, survey, surveys, surveying, questionnaire, questionnaires, vote, votes, voter, voters, voting, election, elections, campaign, campaigns, telephone poll, telephones polls, candidate, candidates, opinion, opinions, undecided, choice, choices, choosing, modern life
'My mom's a Democrat, my dad's a Republican, and I'm a bipartisan effort.'