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Tags:scary, scared, threat, dread, threaten, threatening, terrify, terrifying, halloween, scary skinny, thin, skinny, bones, skeleton, skeletons, adult fear, adult fears, adulthood, adult hood, modern life, modern, adulting, existential dread, existential, scary tan, tanned, tanning beds, sun burn, sun burned, shrivel, shrivelled, scary fat, morbid, morbidly obese, obese, obesity, scary smart, smarter than a, brainiac, prodigy, genius, geniuses, nerd, nerds, geek, geeks
'Ethel? It's Kay! A couple of those cheap lights in the tanning bed burned out again.'
"I've been tanning!"
"He came in right before dawn, and must have thought he was slipping into bed."
"What does that writing on her say?"
Tags:fake tan, fake tans, tan, tan, tans, beach body, beach bodies, beach, beaches, vacation, vacations, holiday, holidays, healthy tan, healthy tans, tanning bed, tanning beds, tanning lotion, tanning lotions, artificial coloring, artificial colouring, bikini, bikinis, tan line, tan lines, bikini body, bikini bodies
"What was she thinking?!?"
Solar-Powered Tanning Salon
Tan salon customers get tan bed power from solar panels.
"I see a tunnel with at the the end a bright, white, light..."
Tanning Salon vs Skin Cancer Clinic
'I'm just making some grilled cheese sandwiches for my co-workers and then you can start your tanning session, miss.'
'You're right. It's not a coffin. It's a tanning bed. He wanted to look good for the funeral.'
Tags:tan, tans, tanned, tanning, tanning bed, tanning beds, funeral, funerals, ceremony, ceremonies, coffin, coffins, look good, looks good, looking good, looked good, bronze, bronzed, bronzing, dead, die, dies, memorial, memorials, death, unusual, different, vein, vanity, appearances, close to home
English Summer: Man in a tanning bed on the beach in the middle of a storm.
Xerosis: Effects of a lifetime of photocopier abuse.
'And we don't discriminate against people of colour.'
'It's hypochondria-we're going to give a pretend MRI on this tanning bed.'
'Do you want it set for light, medium or butterball?'
Toast with tanlines
'Medium well, please.'
'Medium well, please.'
'Oh no, tanneries have changed a lot since the old days.'