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'For tax purposes. . . we can deduct our $7.00 dinners on our tax return. . . the food wasn't worth $7.00. . . they only gave me one scoop of corn.'
Masterpieces from The Golden Age of Tax-Deductible Contributions
Tags:masterpiece, masterpieces, artwork, artworks, artist, artists, sculpture, sculptures, museum, museums, golden age, golden ages, tax deductible, tax deduction, tax deductions, art gallery, art galleries, art exhibit, art exhibits, art exhibition, art exhibitions, tax return, tax returns, tax, taxation, taxing
'Sorry, but under-the-table donations aren't tax deductible.'
"We went dutch - he must have reached his two-hundred-dollar dating deductible."
Tags:date, dates, tax deductible, tax deduction, tax deductions, love life, going dutch, restaurant check, restaurant checks, restaurant cheque, restaurant cheques, cheap date, cheap dates, boyfriend, boyfriends, girlfriends, splitting the check, splitting the cheque, accountant, accountants, accountancy
"Do you want to do that hilarious thing where we read the itemized deductions and then say 'in bed'?"
Procrastination is not tax deductible.
What's this deduction of $20 million for gifts?
'Unfortunately 13 pints and a curry to make up for a c***p day at the office isn't tax deductible under current legislation.'
'I'm afraid there's no tax deductibility for 'A life wasted in fruitless search for fulfillment through the acquisition of meaningless wealth'.'
Tags:accountancy, accountants, accountant, account, accounts, bookkeeper, bookkeepers, bookkeeping, book-keeper, book-keepers, book-keeping, number cruncher, number crunchers, finance, financial sector, accountancy firms, accountancy firm, tax deductible, tax deduction, tax deductions, philosophy, tax break, tax breaks, tax cut, tax cuts, philosophies
"Then again, maybe he does qualify as a dependent."
"What do you mean I can't claim these books on 'tax evasion' as a business expense?"
"You're interdenominational, you attend the electronic church, and you want to deduct your channel changer as transportation. Have I got that right?"
"Even if you do always volunteer to bring the meat dish to church potlucks, you can't claim the congregation as dependents."
"On the other hand, if you would donate your soul to us, think of the terrific tax break!"
"Is it true? The key to getting more allowance is if politicians made it tax deductible?"
"I see you've arranged your life and business so that you can deduct everything. Do you know the penalty for 'trying to beat the system'?"
'I still think burglar tools OUGHT to be deductible!'
'Why can't I deduct my trip to Youngstown? I'm a youth pastor.'
'Giving to the poor is deductible, Mr. Hood, but taking from the rich is still problematic.'
'If you call my allowance a grant, you claim it as a deduction on your income tax.'
"The government and I had a difference of opinion on what was tax deductible."
"Is this tax deductible?"
"Dad, I'm thinking they could be tax deductable."
Tags:tax, taxes, tax avoidance, logic, logical, nursery rhyme, nursery rhymes, mother goose, tax deduction, tax deductions, creative accounting, creative accountant, creative accountants, bo peep, little bo peep, sheep, shepherd, shepherds, deduction, deductions, tax deductible, tax deductibles, my dad is an accountant, young accountant, young accountants, accountant, accountants, bedtime, like father like son, like father like daughter, tax dodger, tax dodgers, family, lost sheep, sheep
'It's better to give than to receive - if you can deduct it!'
IRS: The country is broke, but your taxes cannot be construed as 'Charity to the Poor'.