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"I assure you, Madam, that every penny you pay in taxes goes straight into the government's pocket."
Tags:irs, internal revenue service, government, governments, tax, taxes, tax money, tax payer, tax payers, keep, keeps, keeping, kept, no use, take not give, quid pro quo, assure, reassure, assures, assuring, assured, reassuring, reassures, reassured, skeptic, skeptic, sceptic, sceptical, skepticism, scepticism
'Get these over to the acronym department A.S.A.P.'
'Put him on a high dose of 'value for money' and cut out the 'panic about privatisation' for a while.'
'Relax, I'm from the IRS. Death and taxes have merged.'
'Mr Reynolds, you can't count your litter box as a deduction just because you do your business there.'
"Your third wish should have been to make the first two wishes tax free."
Tags:irs, internal revenue service, internal revenue, wish, wishes, genie, genies, magic lamp, magic lamps, lamp, lamps, taxes, taxman, taxmen, three wishes, tax payer, tax payers, business, businessman, tax free, meeting, meetings, advice, advises, advising, remark, remarks, funny, idiot, idiots, strategic, save, saves, saving, tax avoidance
"I, for one, enjoy paying my taxes."
Tags:tax, taxes, taxpayer, taxpayers, tax payer, tax payers, government, governments, king, kings, monarch, monarchy, monarchies, royals, royal, royalty, alcohol, booze, bar, bars, pub, pubs, drink, drinks, drinker, drinkers, drinking, drunk, drunks, bartender, bartenders, interloper, interlopers, impostor, impostors, drinking companion, drinking companions, drunk, drunks
'I'm being audited! Quick, everyone into the tax shelter!'
Penny Saved, Penny Earned.
"They made some pretty drastic cuts in our execution budget."
Tags:budget, budget cuts, budgeting, cut backs, cutting back, low funding, low funds, economy, recession, execution, executions, death penalty, death sentence, sentenced to death, die, death, dying, dead, government funding, government funded, tax funded, tax funding, tax payer, tax payers, jail, jails, prison, prisons, prisoner, prisoners, crimes, criminal, criminals, canon
Medicare fraud in Miami
'I pay your salary!'
IRS: Short Form.
Put it through as an expense! Nobody's going to check, are they?
Tax consultant humour.
I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.
Tax Shelters of the Rich and Famous.
'Sparby, I want you to go and taser everyone in the accounting department.'
"Can I bring your income tax returns to school for show and tell?"
It's your accountant...I may have made a mistake on your tax return, don't send it in.
If your senator had clout, this would be a $50,000,000 construction project, instead of a $5,000,000 one!
'You know Grace, these little glasses make it easy to spot all the hidden fees!'
Welcome to Washington DC...passing the added cost on to you since 1776'
"Those taxpayers are real extremists."
'While I'm here for my audit, could I interest you in some tax free municipal bonds?'