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'Are you sure that hitting it with a baseball bat will work?'
Tech Support Values
"Please stay on the line while we try to locate someone in tech support whose accent you'll understand."
"It's so sophisticated that we only sell it to buyers who have kids young enough to explain it to them."
'You're on flex time. Come in and call technical support at 4 am when their line is not always busy.'
'Boss, there's a computer on the line. It want's to know what to do with a stupid user who doesn't work!'
"Say that again. I open what? Then click on what? Then type in what? Then save to what. . . ?"
"Are you the party who called tech support?"
Techno-Answers, Inc.: Pro-active cyber solutions to problems you think you don't have, but, wow... are you ever wrong.
"Cancel that call to tech-support. This may be beyond their capabilities."
Product Returns: Have you tried switching it off and switching it on again?