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"This is doing me out of a job..."
"...and if you see anything that 'Isn't Right' on the platform please contact the station staff..."
Man tries to celebrate New Year while a terror alert goes off.
"In an effort to improve building security, you will no longer be allowed to work inside the building."
'No sir, swallowing Jaeger bombs doesn't make you a security threat...'
"Suspected terrorists are popping up all over..."
Map of possible locations of next terrorist attack...
"I'm not paranoid. I'm that other 8-letter word - 'informed.'"
"Ideally we're keen to go somewhere that they're not trying to kill us."
'I expect God's far too busy to protect your cucumbers from terrorists, dear.'
"...But the third little pig heeded government advice and built his house from blast proof concrete."
'Greenspan said today the alert status for possible interest rate changes has been reduced from orange to yellow.'
'Raise the terror alert....again!'
Government Notice: You should be worrying about something.