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"Mr Taylor, your clone is loose again."
"And it should take no more than fifteen minutes for you to begin experiencing the first pleasant symptoms of arousal."
Tags:arousal, arousals, symptom, symptoms, mad scientist, test subject, test subjects, mad scientists, scientist, scientists, science experiment, science experiments, test tube, test tubes, experimentation, human testing, test, tests, experimenting, experiment, experiments, lab, labs, lab rat, lab rats, laboratory, laboratories
"Be tough. Never let them hear you squeak."
Tags:lab rat, lab rats, laboratory, laboratories, lab, labs, experiment, experiments, experimentation, experimenting, tortures, animal right, animal rights, animal activist, animal activists, animal experiment, animal experiments, test subject, test subjects, showing weakness, hostage, hostages, prisoner, prisoners, prison, prisons, incarceration
"Do you even know how long it's been since you last poked and prodded me?"
Tags:doctor, doctors, nurse, medical, medical center, medical centers, medical centre, medical centres, hospital, hospitals, gps, gp, general practitioner, general practitioners, surgery, surgeries, checkup, physical, physician, physicians, doctor's office, doctors office, doctor's offices, doctors offices, science, scientist, scientists, patient, patients, test subject, test subjects, animal testing, rat, rats, mouse, mice, rodent, rodents, nag, nagging
Another successful recruitment drive for the Collins University Medical Research Center.
"Can you be more clear than 'yes, we have no bananas'?"
Tags:chimp, chimps, chimpanzee, chimpanzees, ape, apes, gorilla, gorillas, monkey, monkeys, science, scientist, scientists, experiment, experiments, experimentation, test subject, test subjects, sign language, clear, clearer, banana, bananas, unclear, unclear language, pedant, pedants, grammar, bad grammar
"Can't find your office doc?"
Bob never thought he was good enough. The tests helped him prove it.
"But I'm the tester - not the testee."
'Now what do we do? All our experimental subjects called in healthy!'
"Now, of the twelve drugs we've tested on you, which one tasted best?"
Tags:drug test, drug tests, drug trial, drug trials, medical trial, medical trials, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, pill, pills, medication, medications, prescription, prescriptions, test subject, test subjects, healthcare, hospital, patient, patients, medical research, pharmaceutical, pharmaceuticals
Testing continues at The National Institute of Jokes, Gags, and Puns.
Volunteered for one medical experiment too many.
'You're just the kind of person we're looking for to test our airplane seats.'
Rorschach Test Pattern.
'We'll have Bubba here check to see if we've idiot-proofed your computer.'
'Testing drugs on people before giving them to animals...it's going to be an uphill battle.'
'Actually, we're having trouble finding people to test the damn thing.'
'You were right, you are in the placebo group.'
"Well. . . . we're still a few years away from self-driving razors."
"I guess how this works is the light comes on and I use the phone to sell some software and I get a food pellet and not get shocked."
"This is our test group for sleeping pill products!"
"We're testing a new virtual reality praise & worship system for the satellite campus."
"An individual claim against the Biology Department is unlikely to succeed, but if we can find more plaintiffs, a class-action is possible!"
Tags:lawsuit, lawsuits, lawyer, lawyers, class action, class actions, class-action, class-actions, litigation, legal action, animal testing, animal test, animal tests, test subject, test subjects, animal rights, compensation, compensation society, biology class, biology classes, biology lesson, biology lessons
"Test subject appears healthy with the expception of a suspicious-looking mole."