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"Not much in the way of hard assets, I'm afraid, but he did leave some highly desirable organs."
"I'd just like to know why, if you trust me so much, you've named your daughter to pull your plug."
'Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth - and then some?'
"..and to my cat, Wilhelm, I leave my wifes best couch."
'I 'Marvo the magician', being of right mind...have taken it with me.'
'He is meeting with a team of obfuscators preparing for his appearance before the Senate investigation committee.'
Forget the reward. It's too late to call Crime Stoppers. If you saw what happened, say so.'
'Overruled. Now answer the question. We could all use a good laugh.'
'I believe each testament should have some gibberish that people think are prophesies.'
'What if something terrible should happen and nothing happens to him?'
'My magician uncle left it to me in his will.'
'As you know, your father liked the sport of Boxing...'
'You want to leave your body to science - how about someone with A-level science?'
"And finally after you've read the will, laugh out loud and say I changed my mind and it's all been given to the dog."