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To appease the fans, major-league umpires are now required to take eye exams during the seventh inning stretch.
How Santa really finds out which reindeer can fly.
'Great! So I'll run these by the focus groups and see how they go over.'
'Once again, you were right only fifty percent of the time. Have you considered a career as a TV weatherman?'
'But that wasn't a beaker of acid! That was a cup of coffee from the cafeteria!'
The bane of every college applicant: the admissions essay.
Pushed to the max by the algebra test, Tim's brain spontaneously combusted.
'Does this outfit make me look fat?'
Tags:fat, does this make me look fat, attractive, attractiveness, ugly, lie, lies, liar, lying, lied, lie detector, lie detectors, lie detecting, test, testing, tested, tests, outfit, out fits, out fit, outfits, opinion, opinions, personal opinion, personal opinions, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
Though it WAS possible that Wade's dog had eaten his homework, Mrs. Vorkley tested the remnants for traces of dog saliva.
'I think your son shows aptitude for becoming a pollster. After each Math answer he writes 'plus or minus 10%.''
Tags:teacher, teachers, teaching, taught, math, maths, mathematics, test, tests, testing, tested, exam, exams, examination, examination, parent, parents, parents evening, report, reports, reporting, reported, inform, informs, informing, informed, pollster, pollsters, poll, polls, polling, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
Before picking up a date, Doug always tested his breath on a canary that he kept in the car.
'And over here is our product testing department.'
Ted tests the limits of his new mulching mower.
Garrett knew it was important to jeep his brain from overheating during big tests.
'That's my weird Uncle Benny. He claims that he was abducted by aliens in white lab coats.'
Tags:rat, rats, mouse, mice, rodent, rodents, alien, aliens, abduct, abducts, abduction, abductions, abducted, crazy, craziness, weird, strange, odd, different, claim, claims, claiming, claimed, scientist, scientists, test, tests, testing, tested, animal testing, product testing, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
Bell invents the telephone.
Tags:bell, alexander graham bell, invent, invents, inventing, invented, inventor, inventors, invention, inventions, telephone, telephones, phone, phones, hear, hears, hearing, heard, test, tests, testing, tested, talk, talks, talking, call, calls, calling, caller, callers, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'When do you guys plan to invent a crash test dummy?'
Tags:wheel, wheels, the wheel, invent, invention, inventing, invented, invents, inventor, inventors, crash test dummy, crash test dummies, crash test, test, tests, testing, tested, dummy, dummies, prehistoric, roll, rolling, dawn of man, crash, crashes, crashing, crashed, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'I represent this laboratory rat. We're suing your tobacco company for $5 billion.'
'Pushing to the front of the queue is an automatic fail, I'm afraid, Mr. Singh.'
'For your stress test just log on to your 401-k'
"Don't worry, I've been tested."
Tags:date, dates, dating, modern dating, covid-19, corona, coronavirus, corona virus pandemic, pandemics, epidemic, epidemics, disease, diseases, flu, flus, illness, sickness, virus, viruses, social distancing, social distance, isolation, self isolation, social isolation, tested, covid-19 text, virus test, virus tests, risk, risk taker, risk takers
'She's a gifted child.'
'It appears to be a genuine bat-out-of-hell.'
'I thought you did fine, but I'm afraid you didn't test well with the focus group.'
'I think it's a pretty dirty trick to not spell 'phonetic' the way it sounds.'