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"As you can see, I'm still in my second trimester of shoplifting."
'When is it due Diligence?'
"At which trimester will I be able to communicate with my baby via text?"
'Trust me, the term 'blissfully pregnant' is an oxymoron.'
'It's a girl and she's an artist in her gestational period.'
'Four months I've been in here and I'm yet to see a tenancy agreement.'
'One baby, one placenta, one umbilical cord...stock-taking never takes long in here.'
'This is boring. This uterus could sure do with a fast forward button.'
'I'll bet my luggage ends up at another hospital.'
Please queue here for contraction service.
'I guess I wasn't thinking. I bought a return ticket.'
'I started off as a single cell and now I'm in one.'
'Mom! Is uncle Paulie in his second or third trimester?'
"A decent obstetrician wouldn've never let me progress into my fifth trimester!"
"I don't think it's ever too soon to retain an attorney, nut I think your baby should wait until at least the 2nd trimester."