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"So you're having trouble conceiving. Have you tried sex?"
Tags:ob-gyn, ob-gyns, obstetrician, obstetricians, obstetrician-gynecologists, conceive, conceives, conceiving, conception, fertile, fertility, fertility treatment, fertility treatments, fertility doctor, fertility doctors, troubleshoot, troubleshoots, troubleshooting, tech support, technical support, support line, support lines, fix, fixes, fixing, pregnancy, pregnancies, try for a baby, trying for a baby
"Maybe if I unplug it and plug it in again, it'll fix the mess."
Tags:plumber, plumbing, emergency plumber, emergency plumbers, plumber, emergency plumbing, superintendent, superintendents, building superintendent, building superintendents, super, supers, caretaker, caretakers, building manager, building managers, apartments, apartment, maintenance, maintenance man, furniture, furniture repair, confusion, confuse, confused, burst pipe, burst pipes, pipe, pipes, water, water leak, leaking water, repair, repairs, repair man, repair men, troubleshoot, troubleshooting, absurd, modern furniture, modern furniture design
'Could I have some computer time to troubleshoot this problem?'
'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'
"Murchison’s theory is that it’s dog hair in your fuel line.”
Tags:dog, dogs, dog owner, dog owners, pet dog, pet dogs, dog lover, dog lovers, too many pets, too many dogs, shed, shedding, dog hair, dog hairs, pet, pets, pet problems, pet problem, pet owner, pet owners, pet lover, pet lovers, mechanic, mechanics, car mechanic, car mechanics, car repair shop, car repair shops, auto mechanic, auto mechanics, auto repair, auto repair shop, auto repair shops, automobile, automobiles, cars, car, obvious, obviously, obvious conclusion, diagnostic, diagnose, diagnosed, obvious diagnosis, troubleshoot, troubleshooting, customer service, repair, repairs, repairman, repairmen
“I heard von Schleflin yell ‘Eureka,’ and then kerblam!”
Tags:explosion, explosions, discovery, discoveries, eureka, eureka moment, eureka moments, scientists, scientist, science lab, science labs, experiments, experiment, experiment gone wrong, experiments gone wrong, science experiment, science experiments, research, researchers, researching, accident, accidents, industrial accident, industrial accidents, workplace accident, workplace accidents, safe, safety, workplace safety, office, offices, office life, office culture, problem solving, problem solver, troubleshoot, troubleshooting, emergency, emergencies
"Have you tried doing the thing you just told me you tried?"
"Getting the WiFi to Work"
"Is there a section at the bottom for comments?"
Tags:comment, comments, query, queries, comment section, comment sections, moses, ten commandments, decalogue, tablet, tablets, question, questions, troubleshoot, troubleshooting, canaan, technicality, technicalities, questioning, annoying, annoyance, annoyances, frustration, frustrations, feedback, feedback form, feedback forms
"What happens if you hit escape?"
Tags:escape, escapes, escaping, prisoner, prisoners, prison escape, prison escapes, computer trouble, computer troubles, esc, escape key, escape button, tech support, technical support, it support, i.t. support, laptop, laptops, laptop trouble, laptop troubles, troubleshoot, troubleshoots, troubleshooting
'For an English translation of what the tech support person says, press 2...'
"Hannibal got elephants over the Alps. Bearing that in mind, somebody think of something."
Tags:hannibal, goal, goals, accomplishment, accomplishments, difficult, difficult task, difficult tasks, history, carthage, elephant, elephants, alps, military history, military historian, military historians, historian, historians, solution, solutions, problem solver, problem solvers, problem solving, problem, problems, idea, ideas, idea man, idea men, business man, businessman, businessmen, business meeting, business meetings, troubleshoot, troubleshoots, troubleshooting, punic wars, goal-oriented
"Well, we've tried every terrible solution to the problem and haven't solved it. Does anybody have any new terrible ideas?'
"I need a simple fix. No one asked you to reinvent the wheel."
Tags:caveman, cavemen, invention, inventions, problem solver, problem solvers, simple fixes, invent the wheel, business, reinventing the wheel, innovation, research and development, solutions, simple fix, redesigned, quick fix, engineering, troubleshooting, management, boss, sculpture, stone age, inventions, reinvent, design, simplicity, keeping it simple, kiss principle
"Mom, Dad, this is Kevin, our new ombudsman."
Tags:ombudsman, ombudsmen, parents, parent, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mother, mothers, motherhood, dad, dads, father, fathers, fatherhood, child, children, kid, kids, childhood, family, families, investigate, investigator, investigators, investigating, investigative, authority, critic, complaint, complaints, house, household, troubleshoot, troubleshooter, troubleshooting, troubleshooters, adviser, advisers, counsellor, counsellors, family counselling, angry, anger, shock, shocked, surprised, shocking, mad, child protective services
If machine fails to operate...
"Don't worry Mac, I'll have that happy face back in no time."
Tags:mac, macs, computer, computers, desktop, desktops, vintage mac, vintage macs, old computer, old computers, floppy disk, floppy disks, troubleshooting, troubleshoot, counselling, counsellor, counsellors, counseling, counselor, counselors, therapy, therapist, therapists, shrink, shrinks, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, psychiatry, mental health, mental state, mental states, psychologist, psychologists, patient, patients, psychoanalyst, psychoanalysts
"Thanks for calling the celebration help desk. For assistance with high fives, press one now. For fist bumps, press two, for chest bumps, press three..."
Tags:customer service, call operator, call operators, customer services, help desk, help desks, phone options, automation, phone trees, customers, assistance, troubleshooting, technical difficulties, celebrations, celebrating, celebrate, fist bump, chest bump, high five, high fives, fist bumps, chest bumps, high-five, high-fives
"I have a surprise too. Until I really like a guy, I never give out my real name"
"Try rebooting your computer again..."
"Just so you know, I only tolerate your generation because you can troubleshoot my technology issues."
Tags:workplace, work, office worker, office workers, water cooler, coworkers, coworker, technology, troubleshooting, troubleshoot, generation gap, generation gaps, water coolers, millennial, millennials, tolerate, tolerance, generation x, generation y, computer skill, computer skills, technical skill, technical skills
Cat on Computer Keyboard.
"OK, Mr. Johnson, after you take the computer out of the office toilet where you threw it, try rebooting..."
Tags:it support, technical support, call centre, call centres, troubleshooting, computer rage, cyberphobia, reboot, rebooting, anger management, toilet, office equipment, destroying office equipment, technophobe, anger, angry, support, i.t., information technology, technology, computer, computers, technician, support, call center, call centers
Internal Server error: Your server was unable to fulfill your dream request.
Tags:computer servers, server error, computer errors, server errors, dreamer, dreamers, dream, internal server error, computer error, dreams, dreaming, sleep, sleeping, sleep apnea, sleeplessness, rem sleep, mind, internal mind, computer, memory, ram, hard drive, error, human as computer, augmented human, augmented brain, augmentation, troubleshoot, troubleshooting, insomnia, treatment, diagnosis, causes, fantasy, insomniac, insomniacs