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'Unconfirmed reports suggest that there may have been a breakdown in communication.'
According to a recent medical report, a glass of red wine a day is good for you.
'Tonight's real is estate news is very discouraging. Viewer discretion is advised.'
'We'll be back with a special report on the mind-numbing effects of idiotic commercials right after these messages...'
"Analysts warn that computerization of the villages won't give the expected results!"
"Our next story should interest all our viewers...it's a real can of worms."
"Whatever happened to common sense?"
"The following report contains some flash celebrities."
'Georgia invaded Ossetia. Russia invaded Georgia. Our correspondent in Atlanta will explain that Americans have no idea what's going on.'
News consumption and a new analogue trend.
'We're here to talk to your son about his web site...'
Analysts warn that computerization of the villages won't give the expected results!
'Next...an in-depth report on corporate corruption - excluding, of course, our parent company.'
'A Government spokesman today told the following shameless lies....'