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"I overestimated the amount of fun you can have on a balcony."
'What can I say, Carol... I'm whelmed.'
"Yeah, no, it's vast. I just thought it would be vaster."
"I was hoping that heaven might be, you know, more transcendent."
"I thought the vaguely homoerotic undertones would be better."
Country Music Awards
"The plumber says to put a pan under the place that leaks."
An enlightenment seeker heads back from Truth lookign shocked.
"I'm going to tell my grandchildren about that?"
"This is my son Sam, the doctor; my son Winston, the lawyer; and my son Alden, the lawnblower."
"Lou can't make the meeting. He's dead."
"Yeah, spreading your hood should make you look threatening, but in your case, it makes you look like a love-heart..."