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"We're from Student Loans—we came to repo your B.A."
"He's a nice young man, but are you sure he's an M.B.A.?"
Locally Grown by a Guy with a Masters in Philosophy
"I'm afraid your M.B.A. loses some of its lustre in light of the fact that you were home-schooled."
'Quit basketball to concentrate on school. Are you crazy? Do you want to end up like all those other dreamers with a college degree and no job?'
"What does he know, and how long will he know it?"
"You put PhD on birth certificate?!" "It's never to early to give em an advantage."
'It's true that a college degree might render you overqualified for your present position, but it's a chance I'd take.'
"Son, be honest with me, is your university degree in Fake News genuine?"
Scientists continue their research on the Hippocampus.
"Wait a minute! This is for winning a beard contest!"
"I really love school. There's only one problem. I think not having a college degree is holding me back."
'Quite frankly Stephan, we're all sick of you shoving your cum laude in our faces.'
"Enjoy university darling, and don't come back during the holidays, we're going to air BnB your room."