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"I heard raising your grandkids can help keep you young. Please tell me there's an easier way."
'Eww, when did this building get that hideous gargoyle?'
'At first, I worked really hard at keeping my figure in shape. But after the fifty-thousandth kid, I realized it was a losing battle!'
'Sure, you get wrinkles...but your eyesight goes, so you can't actually see 'em!'
Message in a Bottle: 'If your reading this my hair do is already ruined.'
'I've been trialling that new stem cell rub on hair restorer. The good news is, it works...'
'If you need me, I'll be on my pedestal.'
'Please leave your message after the tone...'
"Fine, but that's the old you talking. The new you would never ask for a refund."
'I hate waking up with coffin hair.'
'But I have to evolve. Scales make me look fat.'
Hair salen: 'Sorry! Closed! Bad hair day!'