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"Hey! There's no soap in here."
A man hangs himself in the voting booth.
"You don't look as if you voted."
"'Bulldog! Bulldog! Bow, wow, wow'—that's how you voted?"
"I'm sure there was something I had to do today..."
'Remember, one of the primary things to do today, is vote!'
"The media don't manipulate the news!"
"Complaints! Complaints! Complaints! If you don't like something, do something about it!"
"I love democracy! But sometimes I think it involves too many people."
Many Americans believe staying home to watch your favorite novela means your candidate will win.
"The candidates this year are really honest."
Voters jump through hoops due to voter ID laws.
'I've been voting Republican all my life, but this Election Day, I'm just going to go out and get drunk instead.'
Exercise is the key to strength.
JOE'S BAR, CLOSED FOR ELECTION DAY, 'See? -- the terrorists have already won!'
The season opens Tuesday.