Wears Cartoons and Comics

'The test results are in. The tightness in your chest and numbness in your extremities are caused by the biking outfit you're wearing.'

'When you said you were wearing designer jeans, I didn't know they were designed by Goodyear.'

'Look at those dang fool teenagers, wearin' their pants hangin' down low like a coupla idiots!'

'If you were a girl, my car insurance would be 30 percent less. I want you to wear this whenever you're driving.'

Connor sports his new Silly String shirt.

'...Never wear the same pair of socks 10 days in a row.'

"Let's not forget who wears the plumage in this family."

'My tux is at the cleaners.'

'This way nobody can pinch me since I didn't have anything green to wear.'

Dale sports his new Chia shirt.

121-130 pounds. 111-120 pounds. Someday

'I don't wear an awareness ribbon in order to bring awareness to the proliferation of awareness ribbons.'

'I thought that he said in his profile that he wore jockeys, not is a jockey!'

For those bitter cold ski days, Craig mad sure to wear his personal fire pit.

To avoid dog bites whenever he jogged, Ken wore his decoy ankles.

For those important occasions when he had to look his best, Barry made sure to wear his anti-dandruff fan.

Beth sent a clear message to Roger by wearing the Blouse Club.

'And who are you wearing?'

'I got tired of webbed feet.'

'All my men wear English leather.'

'Mom puts lipstick on so Dad knows where to kiss.'

'It's a new record, mom - there are six of us in here!'

'Yes, I have a smaller shoe, do you have a smaller foot?'

'You're lucky. Some people don't look good wearing dirt.'