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"Make a note, Henderson: 'May 4, 9:02 a.m. Unauthorized plant life again growing at random on lawn outside main entrance corporate headquarters. Spoiling symmetry and tranquility. Breeding confusion. Have said plants removed and incinerated soonest. Eyes only.' Original to Maintenance copies to Accounting and Security. And this time, Henderson, let's not have any leaks to the damn secretarial pool."
The only thing Fred hated more than weeds were weeds that made puns.
"Now, don't sell me anything Rachel Carson wouldn't buy."
Tags:shopping, shop, shop, buying, buy, don't buy, gardening, garden store, garden stores, rachel carson, environmentalist, environmentalists, environmentalism, environmentally aware, environmental awareness, weed killer, pesticides, dangerous pesticides, ddt, science, scientist, sell, selling, retail
A man celebrates Earth Day while using weed killer.
'Oh my Gawd! He's a weed!'
'Your honor, he's clearly guilty. I mean, just look at what the defendant is wearing!'
"It's a weed killer that kills cancer."
Tags:science, scientist, scientists, lab, labs, research lab, research labs, research, scientific research, researcher, researchers, accidental discovery, accidental discoveries, weed killer, weed killers, cure for cancer, cancer cure, cancer cures, kill cancer, side effect, side effects, medical research
"Oh no, Daisy's committing herbicide!"
'Weapon of Moss Destruction.'
'OK, dig that one up' Identifying weeds on her computer.
"There's got to be an easier way to kill the moss in a lawn"
Housewife with industrial weed killer.
Two neighbours doing their gardening.
A soldier tries weed killer on the flowers in his bearskin hat.
Garden gnomes - one using weedkiller
'Oh my Gawd! He's a weed!
'With the court's permission I'd like to demonstrate the means by which I believe the accused administered the fatal poison to his wife...'
'Let's see the weeds get up through that!'
'Whatever you do, don't get it on your skin!'
"Yes dear, you have worked very hard on the garden. Unfortunately though, you've put the compost on the weeds and the weed killer on my best roses."
Tags:garden, gardening, gardener, green fingers, weeds, compost, roses, weed killer, husband, wife, marriage, flowers, lawn, horticulture, green thumbs, gardeners, green thumbs, husbands, wives, chore, chores, yard work, garden chore, garden chores, rose, roses, plant, plants, weed killers, weedkiller, weedkillers
Tags:wordplay, word play, witticism, witticisms, wit, wits, pun, puns, word-play, word game, wordgame, word games, word-game, wordgames, weedkiller, weedkillers, weed killer, weed killers, murder, murders, murderer, murderers, crimes, homicide, homicides, weed, weeds, weedy, weediness, gun crime, gun crimes
Nursery - Products That Help Things Grow... Products That Kill Things.
Tags:nursery, plant, plants, garden, gardening, grow, kill, pesticide, environment, global, warming, climate, change, nature, product, fertilizer, weed, weeds, nurseries, garden centre, garden centres, garden center, garden centers, climate-change, pesticide, pesticides, weed killer, weed killers, green fingers, hypocrite, hypocrites, hypocrisy, growing things
"How much weed killer would it take to kill my husband?... Er, I mean ten square metres of weeds?"
Tags:gardening supplies, gardening store, gardening stores, gardening shop, gardening shops, weed killer, weed killers, weedkiller, weedkillers, murder, murders, murderer, murderers, homicide, homicides, gardening tips, gardening advice, husband, husbands, wife, wives, marital problems, marriage problems, mariticide, mariticides
"I meant with weed killer!"