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'And finally, I would like to be buried with an elephant bone...Just to confuse future archaeologists.'
They were sad when they found out their Grandfather had died in an earthquake.
'I think we should both write our wills, just in case anything happens.'
"I don't want to leave anyone or anything a goddamn cent!"
Tags:take it with you, taking it with you, rich, riches, wealth, wealthy, wealthy elite, wealthy elites, elitist, elitists, elitism, greed, greedy, selfish, selfishness, inheritance, inherit, inherits, inheriting, will, last will and testament, write a will, writing a will, lawyer, lawyers, 1%, privilege, privileged
"Someday, son, all this will be yours."
"Sure, it's all inherited wealth, but if you knew my parents, you'd say I earned every penny."
Tags:inherited wealth, heir, heirs, family wealth, family fortune, family fortunes, fortune, fortunes, family life, family-life, heir, heirs, family, earning, earnings, inherited money, silver spoon, silver spoons, silver-spoon, silver-spoons, family money, inheritance, will, trust fund, trust funds, trust fund baby, trust fund babies, logic, privilege, privileged, envy, envious, dysfunctional families, dysfunction
"Before I serve you dinner, it was in the chicken's last wishes that you watch his video will."
Tags:restaurant, restaurants, dining out, eating out, meal, meals, food, eating, dining, dinner, dinners, waiter, waiters, server, servers, service, customer service, chicken, chickens, meat, serving, video, videos, film, films, movie, movies, death, dead, dying wish, dying wishes, last wish, last wishes, last request, last requests, will, wills, customer, customers, diner, diners, vegetarian, vegetarians, vegetarianism, veganism, vegan, vegans, television, televisions, tv, tvs, t.v., t.v.s
"And to Nathan, I bequeath 200 terabytes of photos."
Bad Heir Day
'For those with particularly ungrateful children,the inheritance tax can be a comfort.'
Cow's Last Will and Testament.
Tags:cow, will, bequeath, last will and testament, probate, beef, burger, steak, red meat, inherit, inheritance, farm, butcher, dinner, food bank, ribs, brisket, shank, rump roast, roast beef, butcher’s chart, choice cuts, deli, farmer, moo, steer, heifer, bull, leather, death, dead, die, meat industry, meat
"Sheltering in place has lowered my resistance."
Tags:shelter, shelters, sheltering, sheltering in place, sheltering-in-place, resistance, lower, lowers, lowered, cake, cakes, cake stand, cake stands, admire, admires, admiring, stare, stares, staring, crave, craves, craving, restrain, restrains, restraint, will, power of will, pandemic, pandemics, lockdown, lockdowns, social isolation, covid, covid-19, coronavirus
"The document states that you've been left your mother's jowls and upper arm flab."
Tags:inheritance, inherit, inherits, unwanted inheritance, will, wills, last will and testament, mother, body, body image, negative body image, self-esteem, low self-esteem, traits, trait, genetic trait, genetic traits, bad trait, bad traits, look alike, mother daughter relationship, mother daughter, mother, mothers, mom, moms, mum, mums, daughter, daughters, disappointment, disappointed, jowl, jowls, arm flab, gender sterotype, death, dead, loss, rotten inheritance, bad inheritance, unwanted traits, unwanted trait, worst trait, worst traits, dna
"Not much in the way of hard assets, I'm afraid, but he did leave some highly desirable organs."
Tags:lawyer, lawyers, counselor, counselors, counsellors, counsellors, attorney, attorneys, solicitor, solicitors, barrister, barristers, legal counsel, reading of the will, will, wills, testament, testaments, asset, assets, money, executor, executors, heir, heirs, beneficiary, beneficiaries, medicine, medical, organ, organs, organ donor, organ donors, organ donation, transplant, transplants, desirable, death, probate, estate, estates, inheritance
"...brisket ...recipe. Hide it."
"I want everyone to leave the room, except for the cat."
Tags:pet, pets, cat, cats, will, wills, death, dying, deathbed, death bed, deaths, everyone leave, leave, leaving, wish, wishes, final wish, final wishes, last wish, last wishes, final-wish, last-wish, final-wishes, last-wishes, cat, family, families, love, important, importance, priority, priorities
"I would like a will prepared... nine to be exact."
"When you die, can I have this couch?"
Tags:therapist, therapists, therapy, shrink, shrinks, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, psychiatry, psychologist, psychologists, psychology, mental health, patient, patients, couch, couches, sofa, sofas, will, wills, last will and testimony, inheritance, inheritances, inappropriate, inappropriateness, inappropriate behaviour, inappropriate behavior
"And to whom do you wish to leave the bulk of your estate, sir?"
Tags:inherit, inheriting, inheritor, inheritors, beaver, beavers, pet beaver, pet beavers, will, wills, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, will and testament, last will and testament, leaving a will, leaving money, estate, lawyer, lawyers, pointless, pointlessness, wasting money, waste of money, pet lover, pet lovers, animal lover, animal lovers
"I believe in free will... now what?"
"Says here he leaves behind a wife, two children, and forty-seven Twitter followers."
Night of the living will
"Leave me alone. I'm deciding who to leave out of my will."
Tags:will, will and testament, last will and testament, law, lawyer, lawyers, family, families, influence, preference, preferences, decision, decisions, looming death, death, old age, old, will solicitor, will solicitors, inherit, inheritance, inheriting, inherits, money, grump, grumpy, grumpy old man, greed, greedy
'Have you considered making your will?'
'I have major trust issues - my father didn't leave me one...'