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"This is what you get for trying to be a wit."
Tags:wit, wits, witty, wittiness, witticism, witticisms, smart alek, smart aleks, smart alec, smart alecs, jestor, jestors, jester, jesters, firing squad, firing squads, executioner, executioners, execution, executions, death penalty, death penalties, death sentence, death sentences, smart ass, smart asses, dictator, dictators, dictatorship, tyranny, tyrannies, tyrant, tyrants
The only thing Fred hated more than weeds were weeds that made puns.
A well-balanced meal to a kid is a candy bar in each hand.
"I got into the coffee for the wordplay."
Tags:wordplay, word play, wordplays, word-play, word game, word games, word-game, word-games, pun, puns, witticism, witticisms, witty, wittiness, barista, baristas, coffee, coffees, brew, brews, menu, menus, word, career, careers, career path, career paths, sense of humour, sense of humor, cafe, cafes
Edwina momentarily considered sarcasm. . .
'I thought up an incredible sting of rapid-fire witticisms. Too bad they came two hours after my speech.'
"He always said he wanted his last words to be as pithy as possible."
A side of Bach few ever saw.
"I write astronaut banter for NASA."
Tags:nasa, spacemen, spaceman, space people, cosmonaut, cosmonauts, space travel, space exploration, banter, banter, bantering, bantered, astronaut, astronauts, social media, social network, social networks, social networking, witticism, wit, wits, witty, witticisms, wittiness, job title, job titles, job description, job descriptions, cocktail party, cocktail parties
"Ironic, perhaps, but I fail to see the wit."
"Where are all the hecklers? I have some great rejoinders."
"Now just hold on...I've pre-recorded some snappy comebacks since I never remember them during these meetings."
"Do try to seem amused by Howard's single entendres. He's working up to a double."
'To get ahead in business, you can't lose your head. Pun intended.'
Library: 'The Wit & Wisdom of Ebenezer Scrooge.'
'No, dandruff isn't caused by having a dry wit.'
'We can't end the meeting now. I've got this list of snappy comebacks I thought up during lunch!'
'True but only in practice, not in principle.'
Give a weed an inch and it'll take a yard.
Nuns do things out of force of habit.
Drive-ins have G-rated movies and R-rated cars.
A perfectionist pardons everyone's mistakes but his own.
After 40 we send 'Thank you' notes to people for forgetting our birthday.
To some people, having a head cold is the same as having an idea.