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'It's not that Ted was a bad guy, he was just all out of 5's.'
Desk bins: 'Action' 'Action-Worthy' 'Action-ific'... 'Actually Done' (Nothing).
'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'
Rock, paper and scissors fighting in office conference room.
"We have a certain spirit here, Cosgrove. We call it 'esprit de corporation'."
"We don't call these savage screaming fits. We call them confrontational verbal interfacing."
Tags:screaming fit, screaming fits, tantrum, tantrums, unprofessional, professionalism, meeting, meetings, corporate culture, testosterone, working environment, working environments, workplace, workplaces, confrontational, verbal, communication, communications, toxic work environment, toxic working environment
'They've been like this ever since Mary presented her report. It's the worst case of paralysis by analysis I've ever seen!'
"Home office, O.K. Office home, not O.K."
Tags:home office, office home, shower, showering, showers, take a shower, washing, wash, wash up, washing up, clean, cleaning, taking a shower, showering at work, bath, bathing, office, offices, workplace, work, remote worker, working remotely, coworkers, coworker, boss, manager, management, managers
Wild Window Washers
Businessman at a bar mad to look like desk. Bartender says: 'The usual, Mr. B?'
Violence as a Management Tool
Tags:violence, violent, workplace violence, manager, managers, management, management tools, bad manager, bad managers, bad executives, bad executive, bad workplace, workplace, workplaces, boss, bosses, bossy, bad bosses, anger, angry, anger management, office, offices, office work, office life, employee, employees, manager, managers, punch, punches, punched, puncher, fist, fists
"I'm kind of enjoying black-tie Fridays."
Tags:office, offices, office life, workplace, workplaces, job, jobs, work, casual friday, casual fridays, casual day, casual days, dress-down friday, dress-down fridays, dress code, dress codes, business, black-tie, black tie, formal, tux, tuxedo, tuxedos, gown, ballgown, ballgown, ball gowns, ballgowns, gowns, worker, workers, employee, employees, commuting, commuter, commuters, clothes, clothing, fashion, modern life
"We were hoping that you could work from work today."
Tags:work, working, worker, workers, job, jobs, career, careers, office, office, office life, workplace, workplaces, business, businesswoman, sick, ill, absent, employee, employer, employees, employer, work remotely, working remotely, telecommute, telecommuting, remote work, work from home, work from work, home office, in-office, in office, call-in, calling-in, call in, calling in, manager, managers, management, modern life, coronavirus, pandemic, epidemic, recovery, recoveries, recovering
'Attention, everyone. Our CEO will be touring the department in ten minutes. Please take the 'Change is Good' placards out of your lower desk drawers, dust them off, and hang them in a prominent place. Thank you!'
'Thanks, Brian, for your thoughtful and constructive proposal. Without further ado, we'll now dive into malicious, envy-based criticism, character assassination and petty bickering!'
"As I entered the courthouse this morning, I distinctly heard a high-pitched kissing noise directed my way!"
"Want to get out of this dump and go watch television forever?"
"This is first-quarter projected-earnings report--does it make my butt look big?"
'You weren't here to say no.'
"You've been warned, Hoskins."
Tags:snake, snakes, corporate snake, corporate snakes, rattle snake, rattle snakes, work, working, worker, workers, job, jobs, office, offices, workplace, workplaces, business, businesses, businessman, businessmen, manager, management, managers, managing, office life, office culture, office worker, office workers, threat, threaten, threatening, threats, middle management, middle manager, intimidation, intimidate, intimidations, intimidated
"I much preferred the backstabbing to the paint-balling."
Tags:paintball, paintballers, paintballer, target practice, work, working, worker, workers, job, jobs, office, offices, workplace, workplaces, business, businesses, businessman, businessmen, manager, management, managers, managing, office life, office culture, backstabbing, backstabber, machinations, office politics, office worker, office workers, conflict, conflicts
"Corporate Diversity would like you to get a sex change."
Tags:multiculturalism, multicultural, diversity, diverse, diversity in the workplace, employee, employees, employer, employers, work, workplace, employment, corporate, corporate culture, corporate mentality, corporation, corporations, office, offices, white collar, white-collar, white collar jobs, job, jobs, career, careers, variety, varieties, mixture, acceptance, respect, respect one another, respect differences, team, teamwork, work together, equality, equal, equal opportunity, equal opportunity employers
"Welcome aboard, Withers. Now just go see Personnel on seven, and Pants on twelve."
"I enjoy the pearls of folksy wisdom as much as the next guy, but what, exactly, does he do around here?"
Tags:workplace, workplaces, work, office, offices, folksy, folk, wisdom, wisdom, weird jobs, weird job, weird roles, unnecessary jobs, unnecessary job, unnecessary roles, weird coworker, weird coworkers, coworker, coworkers, colleague, colleagues, weird colleague, weird colleagues, random jobs, random roles, pearls of wisom, advice, advice giver
"I know nobody here works with each other, but it seems like morale is down."
Tags:coffee shop, coffee shops, barista, baristas, coffee shop working, workplace, workplaces, workplace morale, morale, low morale, morale is down, working alone, solo working, working from home, work from home, second office, laptops in coffee shops, working, work, out of the office, out of office