John Klossner’s drawing appears to be inspired by that bizarre Cialis commercial in which an older naked couple holds hands while bathing in separate tubs in the middle of nature. Almost all of my captions, therefore, allude to that commercial:
- “You went to all this trouble and forgot the pill?”
- “Couldn’t you have drawn inspiration from a jewelry ad?”
- “This is worse than ED.”
Finally, I imagined that the couple is not nearly as close as the setting implies: “Let go of my hand. I don’t even know you.”
Now let’s see how you did.
There were, as expected, hundreds of captions about the Cialis ad. Some of the best recognized that a couple trying to have sex should not be in separate tubs:
- “If we’re not sharing a tub, why do you need a pill?”
- “Wouldn’t your medication work better if we were in the same tub?”
- “I’m glad the medication is working for you, but it’s pretty useless from over there.”
Here are the rest of the best entries that directly address the commercial:
- “What drug are we advertising?”
- “And what is it we’re advertising?”
- “Explain to me again why we have to do this for the pills to work.”
- “It needs to happen soon. I’m starting to wrinkle.”
- “It looked more romantic on TV.”
- “You know, it feels just as stupid as it looks in the commercial.”
- “I hate it when life imitates advertising.”
- “Do you ever feel as though you’re in an erectile dysfunction commercial?”
- “What do you mean you forgot the Cialis?”
That last caption is similar and superior to one of my own, but I would like it better if the entrant substituted the word “pill” for “Cialis.” Jokes are funnier when not everything is spelled out.
Like I did, one of you thought the woman might prefer reenacting the ad for a different product: “We should have done the mattress commercial.”
Several of you noted that the couple should not be holding hands during the current pandemic:
- “We really should be bumping elbows.”
- “Did you wash that hand for twenty seconds?”
But one of you explained why the woman insists on violating this prohibition: “I’m trying to keep your right hand occupied.”
Though I’m constantly exhorting you all to submit captions that are as short as possible, I like this unusually long entry: “Would you be a darling and trudge down there for a bucket of water, build a fire to heat it, and then warm up my tub?” It’s lengthy, but there’s not a wasted word, and the length actually serves the joke.
By contrast, here’s a fine example of a good short caption: “I’m stuck.”
Finally, here are four solid captions that don’t fit neatly into a particular category:
- “I’m completely naked here and you’re looking at the stream?”
- “Do you ever wish you had contributed more to your 401K?”
- “I’m sorry, Bob, but I’m seeing someone with indoor plumbing.”
- “It said B&B, how was I to know?”
This week’s winner is, “I hate it when life imitates advertising.”