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'You've been assessed as incapable of doing this work.'
'You lot are wrong - he's fit enough to get back up there!'
'Missing finger or not, I'm passing you fit for manual work.'
"I'll see what I can do - Just how ticklish ARE you?"
'I'm afraid toothache doesn't fit the criteria either!'
'You're disabled, on benefits and, have too many bedrooms - the council's downsizing you!'