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A cat reads an inscription on a mouse statue and thinks, "What crap!"
"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."
'No Johnny...It's not political bias to ask you to add up all the columns.
'This network's news program has been unfairly charged with having a left leaning bias.'
'Interactive TV news.'
"It's great the way that computer algorithms allow the internet to feed me with opinions that reinforce the ones I've already got - all on my phone!"
"In accordance with our policy to give equal time..."
"Funny how it's only the people I disagree with who are biased."