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"Really, Mr. Schwatz, I haven't been that unsuccessful with the psychoanalysis."
"The problem with you is that you try to be a lot nicer than you really are."
Self Help: Get To Know Yourself/Get To Unknow Yourself
"I'll say a normal word, then you say the first sick thing that pops into your head."
"The real question is do you really need a cracker?"
"How dare you—in a straightjacket, no less—psychoanalyze me."
"My approach to psychiatry is that all these problems are caused by viruses."
'I hate to say this but no amount of analysis is going to help; you need a better cartoonist.'
Emotional baggage reclaim.
Department of Dream Studies
"You always want to be the patient. Have you ever wondered what that says about you?"