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"This being another divisive election year, I'm putting a surge protector on your pace maker."
'My hot flashes have become much more tolerable since I bought the surge protector.'
"This was a lot more fun before surge protectors."
'...and all of our power suits come with a complimentary surge protector.'
'He's the only thing around here that doesn't need a surge protector!'
"You're acting all frantic and excitable...have you removed your surge protector again?"