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"Your slogan should be 'Rest assured. My wife will do it.'"
'I'm going for a plea bargain. Right now, I'm accused of being a lazy slug. But if I plead guilty, I might get it reduced to the lesser charge of malingering.'
"As you can see, I need one more wall to make this space really work."
Tags:husband, husbands, wife, wives, married life, married couple, marital problem, marital problems, wall, walls, interior design, interior designs, interior designer, interior designers, marital life, marriage problem, marriage problems, living room, couch potato, couch potatoes, couch-potato, couch-potatoes, slob, slobs, lazy husband, lazy husbands
"My voices told me to just relax today!"
What wives say...what husbands hear...
"Why go out to eat tonight if we can just cook that nice steak in the corner?"
Tags:marriage, married, marriage problems, dating, date night, lazy, laziness, steak, steaks, restaurant, dining, home dining, unexciting, boring, comfortable relationship, sofa, couch, couch potato, couch potatoes, husbands, husband, lazy husband, home cooking, loss of spark, spark lost, long term relationship, rotting, rot, rotted
"Would you get me another beer? I have the express written consent of major league baseball."
Jerry can't come to the phone. He's just entered the vacation mode."
Tags:cant come to the phone, phone, phones, phone call, phone calls, doging calls, ignoring calls, vacation mode, vacation, vacations, holiday mode, holiday, holidays, holidaying, vacationing, r&r, rest and relaxation, relaxing, relax, do not disturb, out of office, husband, husbands, wife, wives, lazy husband, lazy husbands
"Gold is finally making a move and you sit here doing nothing."
Tags:gold, gold trading, gold market, gold markets, investment, investors, invest, investor, financial, financial market, financial markets, investment strategy, investment strategies, gold value, price of gold, infomercial, infomercials, late night tv, lazy, laziness, lethargic, lethargy, couch potato, couch potatoes, nagging wife, nagging wives, nag, nagging, nagging spouse, nagging spouses, lazy husband, lazy husbands, relationship, relationships, married life, married lives, unemployed, unemployment
"Here - now you're a couch potato au gratin."
Tags:couch potato, couch potatoes, lazy, laziness, lazy husband, lazy husbands, husband, husbands, dote, dotes, doting wife, doting wives, potato, potatoes, potatoes au gratin, au gratin, cheese sandwich, cheese sandwiches, sandwiches, sandwich, cheese, expectant, take for granted, takes for granted, taken for granted, slacker, slackers, slack off, slacks off, slacking off, lazy, laziness, partner, partners, couple, couples, slovenly
The number of couples separating keeps growing.
Tags:separating, separation, separations, divorcing, marital breakdown, marriage breakdown, marriage breakdowns, marital breakdowns, separated, divorce, divorces, divorce rate, divorce rates, couples, couple, relation, relations, gender equality, relation problems, marriage, lazy husband, lazy husbands, wife, wives, husband, husbands
'Well..? Those flowerbeds won't destroy themselves.'
Tags:flowerbed, flowerbeds, flower, gardens, gardener, gardeners, flowers, garden, gardening, dog, dogs, canine, activity, activities, just doggy thing, dig, digging, dig up, destruction, destroy, nag, nagging, husband, wife, marriage, married, armchair, newspaper, chores, lazy, lazing, lazing around, couch potato, couch potatoes, couch-potato, couch-potatoes, laziness, lazy husband, lazy husbands
What she said/What he heard...
Get up and in shape!
"It sounds like Osama bin Laden, but it could be your mother."
Tags:phone, phone call, phone calls, on the phone, calling, call, calls, mother, mothers, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother in law, mothers in law, mil, mils, husband, husbands, wife, wives, married couple, married couples, relationship, relationships, insult, insults, insulting, relationship issues, bad relationship, bad relationships, red neck, red necks, lazy husband, lazy husbands
"When are you going to get up off your ass and start putting on the ritz."
Tags:relationship, relationships, marriage, marriage, bad relationship, bad relationships, bad marriage, bad marriages, abusive relationship, abusive relationships, mean wife, bossy wife, mean wives bossy wives, gender stereotype, negative stereotypes, lazy, lazy husband, lazy husbands, ritz, classic film, classic films, film, films, song, songs, musical, musicals, singing
They tell us we have to save energy. Well he hasn't expended any in fifteen years.
Mother with baby and puppy in a sling and her husband in the buggy.
'He's in training for the marathon, he watches it every year.'
Home Improvement Books: 'Well, they finally wrote one for Walter.' (If it ain't broke, don't fix it.)
'When he crashes I just disconnect all the wires and peripherals and shut him down for a few minutes. He'll boot right up after that.'
Monument to the one who did the dishes yesterday
Tags:monument, monuments, housework, household labour, household labor, dishes, doing the dishes, sexist attitudes, sexist, sexists, lazy husband, lazy husbands, bad husband, bad husbands, unequal distribution of household labour, unequal distribution of household labor, relax, relaxing, complacent, complacency, self-satisfied, divorce, reasons for divorce, divorce him
"And to think as a child he hated taking naps."
Tags:lazy, laziness, lazy man, lazy men, nap, naps, napping, napper, nappers, napped, catnap, catnaps, kid, kids, recliner, recliners, armchair, armchairs, relaxation, relaxations, lazy husband, lazy husbands, sleepy, sleepiness, grown up, grown ups, childhood, childhoods, couch potato, couch potatoes, slob, slobs
"By the way...there's a 'kiss my ass' casserole on the counter!"