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"Looks like you're out for the season - you've got a torn rotator cuff."
Tags:history, myths, health, fitness, rotator cuff, rotator cuffs, injury, injuries, repetitive stress, throwing arm, throwing arms, lightning bolt, lightning bolts, zeus, jupiter, greek god, greek gods, roman god, roman gods, dl, disabled list, disabled lists, baseball, baseball player, baseball players, mankoff
"Darn - missed! I wish I had one of those space-based lasers."
"You'll see, this is going to cause real trouble."
'Hey...pull my finger.'
"I feel like every time I turn into a swan there's this expectation of sex."
Angel Uses Lightning Bolt Like Sniper Rifle
Tags:gun, guns, gunman, snipe, sniped, sniper, snipers, sniper rifle, scope, scoped, no scope, scoped in, aim, aimed, angel, angels, unlikely, heaven, heavens, heavenly, lightning, lightning bolt, bolt, bolt action, bolts, repent, repents, repenting, retribution, retribution, god, gods, godly, god above, zeus, jupiter, religious imagery, religion, religions, myth
"Pretty good, but I'll bet you can't hit him again."
"What do you care what other people think? Just run zig-zaggy."
"I found them."
"Gee, I always figured him for No. 1!"
"Hi, I'm Zeus, the man behind the myth."
Tags:smalltalk, making conversation, conversation starter, conversation starters, chat-up lines, chat-up line, pick-up lines, pick-up line, unbelievable pick-up lines, zeus, greek mythology, myths, legends, myth, legend, god, gods, greek gods, ancient greece, lies, lie, lying, self-aggrandizement, self-aggrandising, self-aggrandizing, boasting, boast, boastful, greetings, meetings
"See if you can hit Florida."
Tags:aim, aimed, angel, angels, unlikely, heaven, heavens, heavenly, lightning, lightning bolt, bolt, bolt action, bolts, repent, repents, repenting, retribution, retribution, god, gods, godly, god above, zeus, jupiter, religious imagery, religion, religions, myth, florida, florida man, god, gods, region, regional, america, american, united states, us, usa
Zeus injects himself with steroids before throwing lightning bolts
Tags:zeus, greek gods, greek god, myth, myths, mythology, lightning, lightning bolt, lightning bolts, bolt, bolts, throwing, throwing arm, muscle, muscles, biceps, arm muscle, arm muscles, sport, sports, baseball, pitcher, pitchers, pitching, steroids, steroid use, scandal, scandals, injecting, injecting steroids, cheating, cheater, cheaters, illegal, illegal steroids, illegal steroid use, needle, needles, steroid abuse
After the death of New York City, Zeus placed it in the heavens as a constellation.
Tags:new york, ny, urban, city, cities, constellation, constellations, star, stars, space, outer space, astronomy, astronomer, astronomers, astrology, astrologist, astrologists, science, zeus, greek, greek god, greek gods, greek mythology, myth, myths, legend, legends, history, historical, heaven, heavens, death, dead, borough, boroughs, five boroughs, manhattan, brooklyn, queens, the bronx, staten island, map, maps, outline, outlines, new, modern, modern life
The gods drink beer while Zeus throws a thunderbolt.
Tags:zeus, jupiter, lightning, lightning bolt, lightning bolts, olympian, olympians, greek god, greek gods, roman god, roman gods, dare, dares, daring, challenge, challenges, drinker, drinkers, drinking, drinking buddy, drinking buddies, friend, friends, friendship, friendships, bar, bartender, bartenders, bartending, dart, dart game, dart games, bar game, bar games, drinking game, drinking games
Zeus lights a cigar with a lightning bolt.
Zeus reading book titled 'Omnipotent Beings Who Do Too Much.'
"I hate to be a downer, but, statistically, people are more likely to die of heart disease than by getting
Tags:heart disease, zeus, lightning bolt, lightning bolts, god, gods, greek god, greek gods, roman god, roman gods, greek myth, greek mythology, statistics, hit by a bolt of lightning, stat, stats, unlikely, unlikely event, unlikely events, heart attack, heart attacks, heart disease, aim, aims, aiming, bad aim, poor aim, mock, mocks, mocking, disrespect, disrespects, disrespecting, disrespectful, throw, throws, throwing, bad shot, bad shots
Australia's Short-Lived God
'Lift with your knees not your back.'
"It's one of the Koch brothers, better take it."
Tags:koch brothers, charles g. koch, charles koch, david koch, david h. koch, political activist, political activists, political activism, influencer, influencers, businessmen, businessman, corporate culture, deity, deities, god, dogs, zeus, movers and shakers, political donor, political donors, donor, donors
Major credibility problems on Mount Olympus.
"You're lucky he's so supportive, Leda. A lot of men would probably feel threatened f their wives laid an egg."
Tags:leda, leda and the swan, clytemnestra, helen, castor, pollux, egg, eggs, ancient greek, ancient greeks, ancient greece, greek myth, greek myths, greek mythology, classical myth, classical myths, classical mythology, husband, husbands, wife, wives, zeus, tyndareus of sparta, supportive husband, supportive husbands, egg, eggs
"It's called monotheism, but it looks like downsizing to me."
Tags:roman empire, christian, christians, christianity, god, gods, greek, roman, greek god, greek gods, myth, myths, mythology, mythological, monotheism, monotheist, monotheists, zeus, mercury, athena, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, job cut, job cuts, restructure, restructures, restructuring, corporate downsizing, layoff, layoffs, laid off, goddess, goddesses, pagan, pagans, paganism, spread of christianity, corporate culture
"I hate that they never know what hit them."