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"My take-home pay is barely enough to take home."
"The check is in the mail."
"I see it's payday again Perkins!"
"Of course the job has benefits - you benefit by getting a paycheck every week!"
'Thanks, but I'm not a beggar. This is just the way my boss pays me my salary.'
'I get an outrageous bonus, but it's never investigation-by-congress-outrageous.'
'After deductions you owe us forty two pounds.'